Page 30 of Reckless Liar

He leaned against the counter and studied me. “So, it was good?”

“Yeah. It was fine. He’s a perfectly nice guy. He has a good job and was respectful of me.” I opened the fridge, grabbing a bag of baby carrots.

He leaned forward, taking a carrot out of the bag in my hand. “Is that what you want? Someone to be respectful? That’s your type?”

Setting the bag down, I turned to get a bowl from the cabinet. “I have no idea what my type.”

“So, you never thought about it?”

“I never thought I’d be single. Not again. Even when Max and I broke up, it was so short that I didn’t have time to think about what I should look for in a guy.”

“You haven’t thought about it at all?”

I dumped the bag of carrots in a bowl and set them in the middle of the counter between us.

“I don’t know. Not in a real concrete way. I mean, I’ve thought about guys, you know. First kisses and dates and stuff. But nothing real. Nothing like tonight.”

“Did he kiss you?” Xander asked, his face blank as he waited for my answer.

I hesitated, my stomach churning. I looked away from him. “You don’t really want to know what happened on my date.”

“You’re right. I don’t want to know about another guy kissing you. But I need to know.”

“Why?” I asked.

“So, I can know how serious you are about this guy,” he explained.

“It’s only been one date. I don’t even know how I feel.”

“But you’re going out with him again,” he finished.

I nodded at Xander. “Maybe.”

“Do you see this going somewhere?”

I pushed my bangs out of my face, huffing loudly. “I don’t know. He seems like he could have some potential. We need to see, I guess.” I narrowed my eyes. “Why does it matter who I see? Aren’t you seeing that one girl?”

He considered me, a grimace on his face. “It doesn’t, I guess. I wanted to know.”

“Well, now you know.” I smoothed out the bag that the carrots came in, running my hand over it three times before folding it into a small square. Then I unfolded it and repeated the action. Again, and once more, before placing the folded plastic square into the recycling bin.

“Are you sure you’re ready to date?” he asked me. I avoided his eyes. His question was a valid one. I wasn’t sure, but I knew the acceptable time of mourning was over for me. Whether I was ready or not, I was getting pressure to move on with my life.

“Not really. But I think I have to,” I confessed.

Xander stepped closer to me, his hand coming down to rest on the counter between us. “Sweet, you don’t have to do anything you don’t want to. Just because your mom, or Scarlett, or whoever thinks you should, doesn’t mean...”

“No, I need to. Am I scared? Sure. But does that mean I shouldn’t try to move on?”

If I was going to start dating again, someone like Troy seemed like a good start. He was the opposite of Max in every way. He wasn’t especially suave; he was cute where Max was striking. He was college educated, respectable middle-class upbringing, a steady job. He was nice, sweet even. I knew the moment I met him my parents would approve. While I’d never tell Xander, I knew from our kiss that he could never break me the way Max did. I was at no risk of being hurt that way. Because I was at no risk of falling in love.

“Maybe being with a guy like Troy will help me move on.” I met his eyes, shrugging my shoulders. “It can’t hurt anything.”

I stared at him as he stepped closer to me, his arm grazing mine. His foot between mine. He was so close I could smell the dirt on his shirt, see the few blades of grass that stuck to his collar. “I don’t like it, Ana. I don’t like the idea of you seeing some stranger.”

“He’s not a stranger. He’s friends with Emma. Scarlett would never let me go out with some crazy random.” My breath came out husky. I wanted to back up. I wanted to get away from Xander, but I also wanted to get closer. My eyes flickered to his lips. I took a shaky breath. “Anyway, why do you care so much? I don’t get it. Did I give you a hard time about that loony girl who stole your drink? Aren’t you seeing her?” I asked. A pit formed in my stomach. I didn’t like the idea of him dating a girl I hadn’t met.

With those words, the trance broke. He blinked at me quickly, stepping back. His hands shoved into his pockets, he rocked back on his heels. “Ugh, yeah, kind of. I guess I am.”

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