Page 20 of Her Warrior Fae

I cleared up the fur rug, and Nylah carried my bag to it. We sat down.

“May I?” she asked, nodding to the bag.

“Sure.”

She unpacked everything I’d brought, producing what I’d already shown her and adding freshly baked rolls and an assortment of cheese to the mix.

I opened the wine and poured us each a glass, which Nylah fetched from the kitchen.

“What are the new recruits like?” Nylah asked when we sipped wine and ate cheese and berries on our bread.

“They’re new,” I said. “It’s going to take some time to whip them into shape. They still think they’re everything just because they’ve been chosen to be warriors.”

“It’s a great feat,” Nylah pointed out.

I nodded. “It’s a privilege to be chosen, but a big head will get them killed. They can’t think they’re invincible. When they realize they’re not, it might be too late.”

“We’re not at war,” she said, “they have time.”

“I’m not here to enjoy the peace,” I said. “I’m here to make sure that if anything goes wrong, we have an army that can handle it.”

Nylah nodded, and we sat in silence for a while.

“I never thanked you for the tea you sent,” she said.

“Of course.” I smiled. “And Marica sends her love.”

“How is she? The boys must be getting big now, too?”

I nodded. “Xenos is mated now and stationed at Gloverbalt. He’s a lieutenant now.”

“Really? A lieutenant? And I can’t believe he’s mated already. It feels like he was Deron’s age just the other day.”

“Time flies. Before you know it, another century has passed.”

“It’s incredible,” Nylah agreed.

“How is Vanya doing in Palgia as the new high priestess?” I asked.

“She’s doing really well. Better than I thought she would be. She’s got a gift. I’m glad she’s using it, doing what she’s been called to do.”

“I think we all have a calling one way or another. Going against it just makes life hard.”

“I don’t know…” I looked at Nylah, who drew circles around the lip of her wineglass with a slim finger. “Lately, I’ve been wondering about callings, about where we belong and what the bigger picture is.”

“Does this have to do with what you’ve been struggling with?” I asked.

It was unlike Nylah to feel so torn about what a calling meant. She was the forerunner for fulfilling a destiny. Ellie was queen, thanks to Nylah insisting that everything would work out right in the end.

“It does,” Nylah said slowly. I kept quiet, waiting for her to fill the silence with whatever she wanted to tell me. I’d found not being able to put everything I thought and felt to words had a small merit to it—being silent meant everyone else said what they wouldn’t have said if someone else had filled the void with their own thoughts. “I feel like, after all this time, I thought I knew Terra and where I belong in this life. I’m just not so sure of who I am anymore.”

“What do you mean?” I pressed. “You’re the High Priestess of Jasfin, and you’re a wonderful friend and pillar of strength and support to everyone around here. You mean a lot to a lot of people.” I hesitated before I added, “Especially to me.”

“I guess I’m scared of what it might mean if we keep doing this. I’m the High Priestess. Terra gives me visions and dreams with snippets of the future so that I can guide people to the light, so that I may be there for them in their times of darkness. When I get visions, I’m usually very open to what they mean, but lately, the last vision—”

“You’re allowed to want something for yourself for a change,” I said. “You’re always doing everything for others. Your selflessness is one of the reasons I love you. I’m sure after all you do for others, you’re allowed to focus on yourself and what you want and what you need, too.”

Nylah looked up at me, her eyes filled with something I couldn’t quite decipher.

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