Page 106 of Beautifully Wild

I laugh because it sounds insane. Mum’s gaze lifts, and I realize she’s serious. “Oh, how awful for Gran. Was she ostracized? Wait, you believe it, and you think she… what?Performed magic onme?”

“It sounded that way as it wasn’t a religious prayer she was quietly singing. Ivy told us you were like her, and it has haunted your father ever since.”

I shake my head to unravel my confusion. “She loved us and both of you. She helped out when you needed her to take care of us when you worked late hours. I don’t understand. She was nothing but kind.”

“Ivy was always kind, Eden.” She finds a picture of Pop and hands it to me. “I’ll tell you what your grandfather told your father and me. He met Ivy when she was seventeen, and they fell in love. He knew the moment they met he’d marry her even though she was different than the other girls her age. Everyone wanted to find a nice boy, get married, and have kids. It’s what they did in their era. Only Ivy was always helping someone. She had a kind soul like you said. She was also a littlewildfor those days. She studied nursing, and her shifts during her training meant your grandfather and her were apart for long stints. So, they set up rendezvous weekends. She’d sneak out of the nursing quarters and would visit him. She ended up pregnant with your father, and they had a quick wedding. Only in her heart, she wanted to continue nursing. She had told your grandfather she’d always wanted to travel and volunteer overseas as a nurse.”

I run my fingertips over the matte surface of the photograph. Only now, I note the musky scent coming from the box, as though it hasn’t been opened in years. The image of my pop holds more than just a snippet in time—it’s the beginning of a world of secrets.

“She developed postnatal depression, and so he let her go,” Mum continues. “She was gone for almost three years and returned before Winston started prep school. She said her place was with her husband and her son, only she had this sadness about her, and they fought a lot. Eventually, she confessed she’d had an affair during her travels. Had a daughter, Dawn, and lost her at twelve months old. She came home brokenhearted. Although she promised your grandfather she was in love with him, not the other guy.”

I gasp and cover my mouth. “Oh, Mum, I had no idea. It’s so sad for everyone.”

Mum nods. “Your grandfather set some ground rules. She was to give up nursing to be a mum and wife one hundred percent. It turned out she had complications and had a hysterectomy overseas, so they couldn’t conceive any other children. She almost died by account. Anyway, she never spoke about her travels. We only know about it from what we found in this box when she passed. The sad thing is your father partly blamed her for your grandfather’s death. He became an alcoholic and drank himself to sleep every night. He had a massive heart attack and died at fifty-five. Winston had already thrown himself into our business with a vision of making the building we inherited to be something special. He thought you could also be part of it since you wanted to help out from a young age, even when you were at school. Faith had her heart set on law and had no interest to work in tourism on any level, and besides, he couldn’t handle her stubborn nature.”

Pride warmed my heart. “Part of why… did it stem from keeping me in close check because Gran thought I was like her?”

“He saw something in you, which also reminded him of your gran, but also reminded him of himself. I don’t believe it was so you wouldn’t become wild like your Gran.”

“Wild.” I roll my eyes. “I wanted to travel and see the world. You both have traveled.”

“Eden, it’s the jungle.” She flips through images and scrambles through the box until she finds a picture. “This is Gran. She’s in the jungle surrounded by native Americans with spears. None are wearing clothes except for grass skirts, including Gran.”

I study the image. Blonde hair falls over her shoulders covering her breasts. Gosh, she looks like me. My heart races. I know where this was taken. Only I don’t recognize any faces. One of the ladies holds a white baby.

“Is this…?”

Mum nods. “Apparently, it’s Dawn.”

My chest tightens. My thoughts race. What would giving birth in a village like Ulara be like? Without the Samuel’s of the world, things would’ve been harder. Then, I remember Kaikare protecting me from that deadly spider. Perhaps they wouldn’t have been that much harder after all.

“Now you know why your father gets upset.”

“Yeah, I do.” I release a breathy sigh.

Our eyes meet, again an understanding passes between us before Mum restacks the photographs. “Apparently, there’s a journal about her time in the Amazon, but she gave it to her friend as your pop banned her from talking about it. I think if she hadn’t got rid of it, Albert might have burned it.” She tilts her head as though recalling a memory. It sounds like an extreme measure, only now I understand why Pop would’ve been angry. “Brenda and your Gran both nursed together, and the last I heard she was in a retirement village. Your father isn’t interested in what happened in the jungle, and we haven’t spoken to Brenda since the funeral.”

I pick up the diary. It’s light, and yet the emotion inside it gives an illusion the pages are lined in mercury. After a quick scrape around the bottom of the wooden box, I’m a little relieved not to find a key. No one has read Gran’s diary. The discolored cover arouses curiosity as to when she started writing in it.

I place the diary at the bottom before Mum packs the remainder of the contents into the box. She does it slowly. Is this hard for her? Does she miss Gran too? She pushes the box over the carpet toward me. “It’s all yours.”

I can’t share what Mum has told me to anyone until I process everything. Until then, the box will remain in my closet for when I’m ready to absorb everything. I understand the joy my gran felt while living in the jungle, yet the pain caused to her husband and my father is so messed up that my heart hurts for them all.

The box can stay locked until I’m ready to inspect her memories with an open mind. I make myself a cup of tea in a china cup like the way my gran used to drink it. I fire up my computer to the open documents from yesterday. After speaking with Mum, there’s a weight off my shoulders. Hoping the universe is guiding me right, I click and send on my nursing application and quickly close the computer before I second-guess my decision.

50

Eden

One Week Later…

Eden: I miss you xxx

I promised Samuel I’d message him every week, and I’m keeping my promise.

51

Eden

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