Page 4 of Into the Light

“Nice smile, man, I almost believe you want to be here.” He laughed, then his fiancee, Alex, took a turn.

There were others, too, hanging around who raised their beers and glasses in acknowledgement. But the one person I was most wanting—and dreading—to see, hung back against the wall.

Ellie Waters, the girl of my damn dreams, stood off to the side, watching and waiting in a little red dress that made my mind go to dark places. When she saw me, she gave a little wave, but didn’t shift. As the group around me dispersed and the crowd moved in, I made my way over to her. The sky high heels on her feet just about brought her to my chin. I leaned down into her space. Not too much. Not to be a fucking creep. But enough to keep me sane.

“Hey, El.”

“Hi.” Her big blue eyes looked up at me through long lashes that fluttered and the combination of her wide-eyed innocence and sexy outfit had my mind doing flips. “Happy birthday, Raf.”

She leaned into me and wrapped her arms around my waist, resting her head against my chest. I could smell the vanilla sugar of her shampoo, the one she’d used for years. I knew this because I never failed to notice her scent. Maybe I was creepy, but I didn’t care.

She squeezed me a little bit tighter, and damn, did it feel good. But it was over all too quickly, as she backed up again and straightened non-existent wrinkles out of her dress.

“You want a drink?” I asked her, looking for something easy and innocent to talk about while I forced myself to forget how good she felt in my arms.

“I should be getting one for you, birthday boy.” She laughed, a musical sound, and her eyes lit up. The way she laughed was my favorite thing about Ellie. Well, one of many favorite things. God, I had to stop thinking about her right now before I made a fool of myself.

Ellie had been the object of my desires for way too long. At first, I figured it was just a stupid crush, just an attraction, and one that was undoubtedly wrong on multiple levels.

First of all, she was my best friend’s little sister. That’s a fucking no-go. Add to that, I do meanlittle.Ellie was barely eighteen when I met her, and I was twenty-four. Way too old to be messing with someone so innocent and sweet.

After she came back from college a few years later, I could admit that she was more mature, but there was still no way I could cross that line. I’d promised Sam I’d look out for her, protect her, while he was overseas in the Marines. And keeping my word was paramount. How could I promise that in one breath and then admit I wanted her in the next? It would’ve made me a scumbag. So I kept my feelings bottled up and pined for her in secret.

Over the years, we’d developed a real friendship. And it meant a lot to me, more than I’d ever admitted to anyone. Ellie was one of the few people who I let in, although she’d probably deny that. I wasn’t good at talking about my feelings. But if there ever was a time I did, it was probably with Ellie or Sam.

Now Ellie was all grown up. Almost twenty-seven. But she was still too good for me. Too sweet, too innocent, too from-the-right-side-of-the-tracks. I was a monster. An asshole fisherman with a shitty past and nothing to offer her. I’d kill for things to be different. But life was what it was.

“You coming?” she asked, breaking me out of my thoughts.

“Yep, right behind you.” I followed Ellie as she walked toward the bar along the back wall. It was smaller and more crowded than the main one, but closer to our table. I hadn’t let myself look down yet, but damn me, when I did, I noticed Ellie’s ass swaying in that little red dress. The dress I now realized was way too short for her to be wearing in public. I glanced at the people surrounding our path and noticed all the men we passed were checking her out. Their gazes went straight to her ass. And, okay, same. But what the fuck?

Ellie was a curvy girl—woman—with an incredible body. The kind of body I would die to get my hands on. But it wasn’t in the cards, and knowing that she was on display for these other fuckers to ogle and drool over made my jaw tick. I doubled my steps to catch up and block her back from view, not giving these other guys the chance. As she stepped up to the bar, I bumped into her, not on purpose, but I didn’t exactly hate it. That sweet ass of hers rubbed up against the bottom of my groin, and I let out a strangled groan.

She turned to me.

“Um, what are you doing?”

“Nothing.”

“Have you ever heard of personal space?”

“Have you ever heard of wearing a dress that covers you properly? What the fuck are you wearing, a napkin?”

Yikes, that did it, because she fully turned around to face me now, her eyes rolled back and her lips in a snarl. And dammit, being this close—and El being so short—gave me the most perfect view of her cleavage, taunting me with the forbidden.

“You’ve got to be joking. I’m not a child, this is a bar. Apartyat a bar, for god’s sake, and I can wear what I want.”

“Yeah well, people were looking.” Assholes were looking. Guys who weren’t good enough for you were looking. I didn’t say that though, instead, I moved my mouth but no more sound came out.

I forced myself to look away so I wouldn’t react to the jiggling of her breasts as she gestured with her arms. Because fuck.

“Who cares? What if I want people to look at me? What if I like the attention? You can’t expect me to cover up like a nun for the rest of my life, Raf.”

“El, that’s not what I meant.” But once again, I didn’t know what else to say because I couldn’t just come out and admit,you look hot as fuck and my dick got hard the second I laid eyes on you and it’s driving me insane and if anyone else so much as glances at you, I want to rip their eyes out.

No. I couldn’t admit that. So I shrugged.Shrugged.Like a fucking clown.

“God I’m so stupid,” she said, with a slight shake of her head. “I thought I’d try to look nice tonight. For you. For your birthday, I mean.” She shook her head, then looked away. “What a waste.” She squeezed by me and dashed off before I could even register what happened.