Page 30 of Room Eighteen: My Pain, Their Pleasure

A laugh bubbles up inside of me, it sounds a little unhinged, but it also releases some of the pressure around my soul. It’s almost too much.

“We love you,” Aiden’s voice is no longer teasing, it’s deadly serious and I know he means it.

I know they all mean it.

My mind, which was racing just a moment ago, stills as peace washes over me in a way I would have never expected.

It might not make sense to anyone else. Hell, not long ago it wouldn’t have made any sense to me. That is when I was fighting who I really am, even though I knew the part of me they bring out was always there.

Can I embrace this? Is there another choice? They won’t let me go, but, even more importantly, I can’t walk away from them.

It would crush me.

I would become a shell of myself and someone I don’t recognize. They make me feel alive. They make me confront the parts of me I thought were wrong and dirty. They make me feel safe.

I take a deep breath and close my eyes, searching my heart and the way their words, their confessions, their souls, wrap around me. Is it all sunshine and rainbows? No. Would some people call me a freak? Yes. Do I really give a fuck?

No. No, I don’t.

My eyes pop open and I look at each of my men, studying them, locking away this memory. Because I know, without a doubt, this is the moment when my life changes. If I accept them fully then there is no going back. It means I’ll be accepting myself as well, all of me. No more running scared. No more denying the darkest parts of me.

“I love you too.” I look at them again. “All of you.”

Cameron’s eyes, as he continues to loom over me, light up. They’re so much warmer than I’ve ever seen them. It sparks something inside of me which feels a lot like pride. I can make him feel this way—loved and accepted. It feels powerful.

When he kisses me, it’s sweet and full of gratitude. It’s so different from the way he’s kissed me before. There is no taking in this kiss, only giving. I drink it down, starving and desperate.

When he pulls back and lifts himself away from me to stand, Aiden is there, cupping my cheek and turning my head. He kisses me with the enthusiasm he shows the world on a daily basis, but it doesn’t feel fake. It feels calming and loving.

He stands as soon as he releases my lips. I open my mouth to ask where he’s going, but I don’t get the chance. Brooks grips my chin, his fingers strong and decisive, claiming and unquestionable. He kisses me with passion, but there’s something else there. Something like thankfulness.

I squeeze my thighs together and moan into his mouth.

He murmurs against my lips, “It’s a good thing you agreed, our pretty little pet, because you didn’t really have a choice.”

I whisper, “I know.”

Brooks’ lips curve into a wicked grin, his hazel eyes sparkling. “We’ll talk about moving you in tomorrow.”

I open my mouth to tell him it’s too fast, but when he shoots me a look, I snap it closed again. There’s no use in fighting anyway; there never really was. I could run to the ends of the Earth and these men would find me.

When Cameron and Aiden join me on the bed, naked and their cocks hard, I forget why I thought it would be a good idea to protest at all. I submit to them, giving them all of me, even my heart.

I’ll be rewarded for it, and I’ll enjoy every second.

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