Page 86 of Our Offseason

Ellie gave me a sympathetic shrug before standing to leave. “Come over to our place for dinner if you want to talk more,” she said.

She took long strides to meet up with TJ, who was waiting for her on the stairs.

“Tell Claire to give ya some compression, bud!” TJ called out with a wink.

I let out a groan.

Ellie sucker punched TJ in the gut, but he just started laughing. She pushed him to start walking away, and she mouthed‘I’m sorry’over her shoulder at me.

33.Claire

I gingerly walked to the living room after my nap. I was trying not to use my abdomen too much in fear of disrupting the stitches from healing. It’s funny how you never think of how much you move your stomach until you shouldn’t.

I sat down on the lumpy living room couch and grabbed up the clicker. I searched through the sports channels to find some old hockey games. Dad had told me that Duke went back to Detroit for his foot, and I prayed he wouldn't suffer any negative consequences from the night he brought me to the hospital.

As soon as I found a Crewman game from last season, I made myself comfortable. I had gotten used to seeing Duke every day, and now I missed him. Watching him play made me feel closer to him. And it felt nice to finally let myself enjoy watching hockey again.

After Duke left town seven years ago, I wanted nothing to do with hockey. I made myself hate it out of spite for him, but I always secretly missed watching it.

I was hoping that this year, things would be different. Games were more fun to watch when you had a personal interest in them and watching games in-person was top-tier. I was already looking forward to sitting in the home crowd section at the Crewman stadium to cheer him on.

I kept my phone next to me just in case he called or texted, but so far, he had been pretty quiet– just asking me if I was feeling alright in the morning, then not really engaging in conversation after that. A little part of me wondered if this was a bad sign, but I quickly brushed it off. We’d never texted before, so that was probably just his texting style…

34.Claire

By the end of the weekend, I was going crazy. I was sure of it. I was not meant to stay in the house for more than a day or so at a time. I was starting to view my childhood home as a prison. I watched everything on my mental list of shows to catch up on, I tried to read, I even tried to get into cooking to keep my mind busy. But nope. I needed to leave this house.

Especially because I overheard my dad on the phone last night talking about how Duke would be back at the rink in the morning…

It was just weird as hell that he hadn't told me that himself.

I had brushed off Duke’s silence as him just not being into the whole texting thing, but now I feared something else was going on with him. Like why hadn’t he stopped over here right after he landed last night? If things were the other way around, he’d be my first stop as soon as I arrived in Northfield. In my mind, I couldn’t wait to see him again. So why this weirdness again? Hadn’t we promised each other that things would be “normal” between us now? And wasn’t it “normal” to tell your girlfriend that you were back after a long weekend away?

I forced myself to hold my tongue until I could speak to him directly. I wanted to hold up my side of being a “normal” girlfriend, but honestly, my patience was wearing thin.

So, not being able to leave the houseandhaving anxiety over the whole Duke situation? That spelled out mental disaster for me.

On Monday morning, I decided to forgo my pain meds for the day so I could drive, and around 10am, I set out for the rink. I’d had enough of babying myself and I had to put my Duke questions to rest. The horrible feeling in the pit of my stomach needed to be dissolved somehow… And maybe he’d be happy to see me and I’d realize that I was just overthinking the whole thing…

I was ordered to take it easy for at least three to four weeks after my surgery, and even at the end of that sentence, I was supposed to gradually ease into working out again.

But I needed to cut that short.

It’s not like I was planning on going out and doing a full run-through of a program, but I did want to at least be up on my feet.

I would convince my dad to start letting me do some light work around the rink starting today. I’d blame it on mental health if I had to, because Iwasgoing insane not doing anything.

As soon as I walked in the rink, my dad’s wary eyes met mine and he shook his head at me.

I tried to move confidently toward his office, but that was pretty difficult while I was still babying my right side and walking pretty slowly.

He let out a deep sigh. For some reason, I caused him to make that sound a lot.

“Did you just drive while on pain med–”

“Nope,” I cut him off. “I skipped taking it today,” I told him proudly.

He crossed his arms over his chest and looked at me dubiously. “And how's that working out for you?”