Page 127 of Till Death Do Us Part

“Go away, John.” I closed my eyes. “Leave me alone.”

“Call me that again,” he said, and I was sure he’d raked his teeth over his lip.

“If I do, you’ll what? Spank me? Tie me up?Hurtme? You already did that.”

I curled up in a ball, pulling the covers over me, refusing to open my eyes. Hours must have passed, and I drifted in and out of sleep. When I got up to use the bathroom and change my clothes, the city was dark, and he was gone.

Chapter45

Roma

“Get your ass up.”

The covers were pulled off me. I pulled them back. They were yanked again.

“Go away, Lo.” I swatted at her when she tried to right me.

“You ready, El?”

They didn’t even count. They just hauled me up. I blinked at them.

“It lives.” Lo shoved a hand at me.

“No,itdoesn’t,” I croaked. My mouth felt dry.

Lo took a seat beside me. “What the hell is going on, Y?”

“I’m sick,” I whispered.

She nodded. “Lovesick. I get it. But why? Is this over the sheet? We all stopped hearing from you right after. It’s been a week, Y. I was going to hurt the security guard downstairs if he tried to stop me from getting in here. John approved us, though. You stopped us.” She poked me on the shoulder.

“Yes and no,” I said. “It is about the sheet, but not actually the sheet. It’s about what it represents.” I wasn’t giving her more than that. I loved my sister. I loved my friend. But this felt like it was strictly between my husband and me.

Elsa walked over to the windows and opened the blinds. I winced when the light hit me.

“Look at you. You’re like the Windy City vampire up in this bish.” Lo shook her head and grabbed my hand. “What’s the big deal, Y? It’s asheet. It was sent. It’s done. Time to move on.”

Easier said than done. He couldn’t heal this if he didn’t know how. I couldn’t get over it if I kept hurting.

“Besides, remember what Mamma used to say?” Lo pursed her fingers and moved them when she continued. “L'amore non è bello se non è litigarello.Or a different version of the same point.Amor senza baruffa fa la muffa.”

“Love is not beautiful if it does not include arguments,” I translated. “Or,Love with no quarrel gets mold.”

“Do you want your relationship to grow mold?” Lo asked seriously.

Going back and forth with John over me returning to work felt like an argument. This felt like something else entirely.

“Before we really get into the heavy debates, how about a shower?” Elsa headed toward the bathroom. “I’ll run the water.”

“She’s right. It’s not fair to argue with you in this state.” Lo lifted a piece of my hair. “I’m going to have to find and evict all the rats in these nests. They’re probably here for themoldycheese you’re growing.”

I shoved her hand away and got to my feet. It wasn’t like I’d been sleeping twenty-four hours straight every day. Maybe fifteen. But I wasn’t always sleeping. I was also thinking and feeling and wishing I could sleep the treachery away.

John was there with me. We wallowed together. Neither of us saying anything. Neither of us knowing how to fix this. He brought me food and drinks and then took a seat in the corner. Just watching. His eyes never relaxing.

I caught Elsa on her way out. She didn’t want to meet my eyes.

“I don’t blame you,” I whispered.