Page 36 of Ruthless Consequences

“That’s it?”

“Her voice. She could sing.”

“Like you.”

I hum the opening, where the guitar would play, before I sing a song she used to. An old Joni Mitchell tune, “A Case of You.” When the song comes to an end, he shivers, like he’s shaking off a cold ghost.

“She sang to you?”

“Sometimes,” I say. “She mostly sang around the house. I remember that.”

I remember that it felt warm, her voice. It felt safe. I’d hear it in the house and know that everything was…okay. She might have been in a different room, but I could hear her. After she left, the house went silent. Ava felt it too. She’d climb in bed with me at night because she’d be afraid. I’d sing to her, filling it the best I could. I told her once that I thought it was the reason Sonny constantly kept his TV on. But she didn’t believe me. She said it was to drown us out.

Lilo’s unreadable after that, but I see determination in his eyes, for some reason. He takes my hand and leads me back toward the boardwalk. I think it’s the end of our date, but it’s not.

“You going to ride that with me?” I chuck my chin toward the towering metal wheel when I realize his intentions.

He gives me a look that I’m recognizing asAre you being fucking serious right now?

“Okay,” I laugh, feeling the warmth of the day slide over me again. “Let’s go.”

He puts his arm around me as we slide onto the Wonder Wheel. The seats rock, and I’m almost in a trance as we go around and around. The view is spectacular. I’m feeling brave and a little hungry as we get off. He buys me cotton candy, and I pick on it as we figure out our next move. He takes me on the Spook-a-Rama, which isfuckingspooky. Voices seem like they’re coming at us from behind. He pulls me close while I protect my cotton candy.

A smile lingers on my face after we get off. That was probably his plan all along. The entire ride, one of my hands held my fluffy candy and the other was locked on his thigh. I couldn’t get any closer.

The smile falls from my face when I pick the wrong ride. It whirls us around, and I pass out on a really violent spin.

My eyes blink and he’s over me. My head feels weird, and so does my stomach.

“Oh no!” I get out before I lean over and lose all the food he bought for me.

He’s holding my hair, and I’m not sorry for it. My stomach feels like it’s been twisted. Or maybe turned inside out. I can’t decide which. He’s quiet, watching me after I rinse my mouth. I can see the relief on his face when I finally agree to eat and drink something.

“Youlook better,” I say, trying not to grin.

“Yeah,” he says. “You can’t afford not to eat. Or lose what you do.”

I shrug. “I’d still like to ride some more.”

“You having fun, baby?”

“This is honestly the best day of my life.”

We stop walking. I can’t even describe the look on his face. It’s almost like this is the best day of his life because it’s mine.

When he brings me to another section of the park, the kiddie area, his laughter booms.

I’m going around and around, up and down, on a ride that resembles a bunch of mini hot air balloons. I’m waving at him like I’m a princess. He’s laughing his ass off while the young woman attendant watches him in awe.

“Can you believe this shit?” he tells her, having a hard time breathing.

“Yeah,” she says, rolling her eyes. “I’m seeing it.”

He’s ignoring her, and it’s pissing her off. She’s pretty.

His laughter fades as we both spin around and around on a massive teacup ride. I’m laughing my ass off now. He refused at first, but after I pouted, just joking around, he gave in.

We walk the boardwalk after. Feeding each other all sorts of food we pick up along the way. By the time we get to where we started, I realize how much we’ve eaten. From amaretto yogurt to a milkshake with cotton candy on it, to seafood—lobster rolls, crab rolls—to pizza. I almost want to grab the sweater out of the bag to hide the bulge of my stomach. It’s tight and uncomfortable, though I didn’t notice it until we stopped talking.

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