Page 23 of Ruthless Consequences

“Your singing,” he says, like it’s the most obvious answer in the world. “You let me inside.”

“I had no clue you were there.”

“You realize who you let in?”

I don’t understand.Who I let in?

“Who?”

“Darkness,” he says.

Then he releases his hold, but he doesn’t put space between us. He leans over me, brushing my breast with his arm, and opens my door. He pushes it out, and it rocks before it stills. I sit for a second, wanting to say something but not sure what. I step out when my stomach makes an angry noise.

By the time I get halfway to my door, he’s standing outside of the truck, watching me. I’m almost running, but he stops me.

“You scared of me now?”

What?

“No,” I say, shaking my head. I refuse to look at him, though. Maybe because I know I’ll do something that will take more time. I’m not sure if I have it. I’ll drag Ava out if she’s in there.

“You should be.”

I shrug.

“Look at me, Lucila.”

I turn my face a fraction, looking at him from the side of my eye.

“Eat,” he says.

“Or?”

“I’ll know.”

“How?”

“You’re mine now, Lucila. I’ll always know.”

Right. Because light and dark always make shadows.

* * *

Later, after my stomach settles, I replay his words over and over. I think about him the entire night while in bed, staring up at the ceiling.

It’s no longer my gut but my heart that’s twisting in knots.

He told me he is darkness. What did that make me? His light?

You’re mine now, Lucila.

I have never felt light inside of myself. All I feel is bitterness. Pain. Except for the times when Minnie distracts me from it all. When Ava needs me, and I forget about my issues for a while.

He knows me, though. My pain called out to his. That’s what he was telling me.

Maybe mine is different from his? But somehow, they’re the same? Maybe different branches but from the same tree?

He’s trying to save me from it. Save me from the darkness that he’s so comfortable in. Or maybe he wants me there with him.

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