Page 7 of A Manny for Christmas

Evelyn hands me the coffee cup, her mouth twisting in what looks like a suppressed smile. ‘The man makes a fair point, Angus.’

My brother opens his mouth and shuts it again, before saying, ‘You’re right. I’m sorry. None of my business.’

‘Damn right it isn’t,’ I say, but the heat has gone out of my voice. I lift the cup towards my mouth, assessing how willing I am to suffer mouth-burn for the sake of my caffeine fix. ‘Look, I’m just knackered, okay? Let me have a nap before you give me a hard time for not knocking women up left, right and centre.’

‘I think there’s probably a happy medium there,’ Angus says. ‘Your gene pool’s notthatgood.’

‘Says my closest living relative. Did you come clean to Evelyn here before you impregnated her that our family has a tendency towards webbed feet?’

The look on my sister-in-law’s face is fucking priceless. She turns to Angus. ‘What thehell?’

I slap my hand on the counter and laugh so hard I almost spill my precious coffee.

‘It’s a joke. But I’d keep a close eye on Rose’s toes, just in case.’

‘I take it all back,’ Angus says. ‘You should never, ever procreate, you absolute twat. Come on, let’s have a seat.’

Once the coffees are poured, we wander over to the sofas. I sink into the depths of one of them. Fuck me. This is very, very comfortable. I could definitely spend a few nights here, if I needed to.

‘Where’s Eddie?’ I crane my neck around. Eddie’s Evelyn’s kid by her ex. Seems they managed to have sex once in their phony marriage. He’s a good kid. Must be ten or eleven now. Or twelve, even.

‘Little place called school,’ Angus says, sitting down opposite me and drawing Evelyn into his side. ‘Heard of the concept?’

I roll my eyes. ‘Got it.’

‘So.’ My brother throws me a smug look. ‘Where are you planning to stay while you’re down here?’

‘I was hoping to crash with you for a few weeks,’ I mutter. ‘Help around the farm,’ I add, before he can accuse me of being a worthless freeloader. I know he has a decent team around him, but every farm needs extra hands, and I’m not afraid of hard work.

‘The downsides of spontaneity,’ he sighs, like a total twat, and I scowl at him. ‘Because you find us slumming it in a three-bedroom cottage.’

I look up at the ceiling. ‘This place only has three bedrooms?’

‘Yep. And the kids have a room each. You can sleep on the sofa tonight, of course, if you need somewhere to crash. But I’m afraid you’ll have to find somewhere else if you want to be here more than a night or two.’

‘I’m sure we can find him something,’ Evelyn says, looking from me to him in a panic. ‘Max is your brother! And he’s come such a long way. Maybe Jess and Zoe can put him up?’

I brighten. Zoe is a long-time friend of my brother. They’ve been best mates since uni—it’s how he got this gig. She’s a sweetheart, and her wife, Jess, is genuinely hysterical.

‘That would be great.’

‘Mate, I’m not asking them to put you up forsix weeks. It’s completely outrageous. Unless.’

‘Unless what?’ Evelyn and I say at the same time.

My brother narrows his eyes like he’s studying me properly for the first time. ‘Would you be willing to work for your keep?’

‘Of course.’ I shrug my shoulders dismissively as I take a sip of delicious, scalding hot coffee. Fuck, that’s good.

‘I may have a gig for you, in that case,’ he says.

3

MAX

Ilean forward. ‘What kind of gig?’

Angus leans into Evelyn and whispers in her ear. He even cups his hand between their faces, so I can’t pick up what he’s saying. Don’t only little kids do that?

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