Page 69 of Dare To Free Us

Bile burned my throat. My stomach turned to hard knots as fury drove my knees to the floor, knuckles turning white from my closed fists.

Everything inside me exploded with self loathing. Blinding pain filled my chest cavity as every muscle in my body coiled tight. After a moment I couldn’t hold back the tide of emotions beating against my soul.

Tipping my head back I roared long and loud at the top of my lungs. It filled the house, bouncing off the walls to hit my ears with tremendous force. By the time I stopped my ears were ringing and my body felt spent as I sucked in deep breaths.

My heart was even more broken than before, because it wasn’t Arianna that failed me. I failed her.

I’m sorry, Beautiful.

I had to make things right. Arianna’s health and happiness were my priority, along with my child. First I had to make things right with Arianna, then find a way to give her and my child what they deserved.

A life free of the mafia.

Slumped forward on my knees, everything felt off balance. The world had shifted and now I couldn’t find a way to right myself. A weight so heavy it almost suffocated me settled over my ribs.

How the fuck was I going to make up for what I did? ‘I’m sorry’ sounded more like a slap in the face than the kind of apology Arianna deserved.

Fuck.

Footsteps echoed in the space. Looking up I glared at Steven crossing the room. He looked nervous, a bit scared, and a lot uncomfortable.

Never before had my men seen me like this. I never broke down. Never let emotions get to me. On my knees in the middle of my home, looking like a beaten animal, it was no wonder Steven couldn’t stomach the state of me.

When a leader is weak, the men feel and feed off of it. When they lose confidence in you the walls of your kingdom begin to crumble.

Coming to my feet and standing to my full height I hardened my expression, I was still the boss and needed to act as such.

“What is it Steven?” I asked, acting as if he hadn’t just witnessed my mental breakdown.

He winced at my appearance then reached out to hand me my phone. “You left it in the car. The men watching Vasilisa have called five times. I called from my phone to be sure everything was ok. They just said she won’t stop demanding to talk to you.”

“Thank you, Steven.” Reaching out I took the phone. Steven’s gaze fixed on the top of the stairs with a sour look. I knew Steven’s past, unlike most, and knew what he was thinking.

Not that it was any of his damn business but I decided to calm his mind anyway, “I didn’thurther Steven.” He looked as if he was going to question it. I narrowed my eyes in warning.

With a quick nod he turned and left.

Pressing the buttons on my phone I called one of the men at Vasilisa’s safe house. It rang once. “Put her on the phone.”

“Matteo?” Her voice sounded shaky, like she’d been crying.

“What’s wrong?”

“Please I can’t stay here any longer. He’s going to find me! I have to get out of here. Just let me leave. Please!”

A large sigh dropped my shoulders, the weight just kept getting heavier. “Vasilisa, you are only fifteen, there is nowhere for you to go. Just give me some time…”

“PLEASE! I can’t go back to him. He’ll sell me to someone awful. I don’t want this life. You should have just killed me.” Her sobs crackled in the phone.

“I’m not going to let that happen. I’ll keep you safe.”

A small humorless laugh bubbled up her throat. “Your not the fist one to promise that.” Her words sounded far away. “My mother once told me that, but when she said it, I didn’t know it was an empty promise.”

“What do you mean?”

“Because she had no power against my father. I know you killed him Matteo, did you never wonder why I didn’t bring it up?”

“I wondered.” In fact, I cringed every time I went to check on her or had a conversation. That it would be the moment she stabbed me in the throat in an act of poetic justice.

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