Page 44 of Dare To Free Us

Luca and I both hated the business with a passion. So, when and where we could, we made sure we kept that shit out of our city. I’d make sure my son did the same.

I would instill my son with the skills necessary to lead with fear and respect in equal measure. To understand that there is a time and place for blood. To live life to the fullest but not forget that responsibility waits for no man.

I wouldn’t be afraid to tell my son I love him. To give him encouragement along with the tough love that would teach him important lessons on how to be the next Don.

And if I got lucky he would turn out to be ten times the Don I was.

For a split second I thought of Luca and the child Becka was carrying in her belly and what he hoped for his future son— or daughter. I was sad too discover my imagination didn’t stretch that far.

The mafia was all I knew. All I’d ever lived. The idea of a normal life was as foreign to me as the surface of the moon.

My hand itched to reach for my phone and dial Luca’s number from memory but stopped myself. We agreed no contact unless it was a life or death emergency. Too many risks of either of us being discovered.

Taking a deep breath I leaned back in my seat and resided to the fact that this was my reality.I am Matteo Russo. Don of the Italian mafia.

My son would carry on my name and, my legacy.

10

ARIANNA

Iopted for leggings, an oversized T-shirt and tennis shoes to meet Vasilisa. One, it was comfortable, and two, I hoped that me looking more casual and relaxed would help her relax. Going in dressed to the nines like somehow I was too stuck up to dress down, didn’t feel like the right way to approach a fifteen-year old girl who’d been cooped up in a house for days on end. Teenagers didn’t appreciate snobs, even if she was one herself— according to Matteo.

Matteo sat beside me as we drove and I would be a liar if I said I wasn’t nervous about being in a car again. Normally I’d casually watch out the window, now my eyes darted across the moving scene like the boogeyman was going to jump out at any moment.

Placing one hand over my stomach I pushed back at the rising tide of fear. Before, when it was just me, the risk seemed tolerable, but with an innocent growing inside me I couldn’t stop thinking of the risk in a whole new way. Small things appeared bigger and more threatening. The large ones caused lumps to form in my throat so big I swore they would kill me.

I found the thought of this being my reality from now on incredibly unsettling. I didn’t like the anxiety, the inability to relax for a simple drive in the car like I used to. It didn’t matter that the odds of another accident were near impossible, I kept waiting for it all the same.

My hand started to reach for Matteo a few times but I stuffed down the paranoia. I looked over to see if Matteo was doing the same, but he was too distracted by his phone. His handsome face pinched in concentration as his eyes stayed glued to the screen and his fingers typed furiously.

Other than a warm greeting that consisted of a passionate kiss that made me inwardly curse my soreness again, we’d hardly spoken.

Something big was happening, I could sense it. Matteo usually couldn’t wait to talk— or do other things when we were together— but today was different. The last time I saw him this distracted was just after Lorenzo’s death.

“Matteo?” His head jerked up with a surprised look, like he’d forgotten I was in the car. “Are you ok?”

He sighed. That one where he was debating on telling me the truth or say it was better I didn’t know.

“We got some information. Tonight we are going to retaliate.”

Adrenaline stung my cheeks, making my heart hammer against my ribs. Matteo would be putting himself in danger. Suddenly a future of me holding our child with no Matteo there stabbed me in my already bruised ribs.Don’t go.

Matteo’s brow furrowed at my shocked, wide eyes. “Arianna I have to go. I am the men’s leader. I will lead them the way I know is right.”

Oh shit, I’d said it out loud. Looking down I ran a hand slowly across my stomach that wasn’t showing yet.He’ll come back. He has to.But… “I’m scared,” I whispered.

I looked up to see Matteo staring me like the world had gone dark. It was the first time I’d ever told him that regarding actions he would be taking. I just always thought that if he knew I was worried he would be distracted, and in turn more likely to get hurt.

Before he could respond our car came to a halt in a parking garage that I hadn’t even noticed we’d entered. The driver got out, but Matteo didn’t move.

“What are we doing here?” I asked.

“Changing vehicles,” Matteo said without any emotion, “I don’t want anyone following us to the safe-house. I may be in business with the Irish and MC but don’t trust them. Just like they don’t trust me. And Shura might change his mind and try to take Vasilisa back. I told her I wouldn’t let that happen.”

“Oh, ok,” I said, feeling unmotivated all of a sudden. Matteo’s news killed my energy. I reached for the handle but Matteo’s grip on my wrist stopped me.

“It will be ok, Arianna,” he rasped in total confidence.

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