Page 58 of Glad You Exist

Liz gasps and sits up, her eyes widening to saucers now.

Kyle holds a hand up, "It had to be done. I should have talked to you first, but I cannot, will not have someone like that on my team. I spoke to a bunch of the guys last night before they left and they’re all in agreement. None of us want him around, and”—he straightens his shoulders, a firm indication that he isn’t backing down from this—“none of us are comfortable with him being around our girls either. We want him off the team."

Taking a deep breath, he drops the bomb on her, "Which means…tomorrow it will be all over school. Principal Gardner will likely—no, definitely—call you into his office."

Liz is sputtering in disbelief.

Her eyes are dancing around the room and she’s clenching her hands in front of her.

Then she pulls her knees up in one swift motion and hides her face between them.

Fuck.

"But…but I can't." Her voice is muffled so we can barely make out what she’s saying.

"You can't what, El?"

She shakes her head, seemingly shrinking in, making herself smaller than she already is.

All of us look at each other.

“I’ll go with you, Liz.” Kim whispers, as she sits on the armrest on Liz’s other side.

She starts threading her fingers through Liz’s hair.

I don't know what magic Kim's fingers have because within seconds of her doing that, Liz’s shoulders droop. Liz uncurls herself, resting her head on Kim's knee, her eyes closed.

Without a word, Kim continues to thread her fingers through Liz's hair until she relaxes completely.

Just as I think Liz is about to fall asleep, her eyelids flutter open. She leans back on the couch, pulling her legs up again. She gives Kim a grateful smile, resting her chin on her knees,

"My mom used to do that. Always calmed me down."

I make a mental note of that.

She’s whispering but her voice is crackling with so much pain.

It feels like someone's ripping my heart out.

A tear slips out of her. She sighs, and resting her cheek on a knee, she turns her gaze upward.

"I miss her. I don't know how to be strong without her."

She sniffs and instinctively we all reach out for some part of her.

Kim starts running her fingers through Liz’s hair again.

Kyle reaches over to squeeze her knee.

I cup her cheek, tracing it with my thumb.

As if that’s what she was waiting for, Liz breaks down. Her chest starts heaving with every sob like she has been holding it in until she felt safe enough to let go.

With that my heart goes straight down the garbage disposal.

The other two let go, allowing me the space to gather her into my lap and hold her.

I nestle her head between my neck and my chest, my cheek resting on her head.

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