Page 48 of Never Quiet

“Right, twice and eating way too many cookies.”

“What brings you by, Erick?” Davis asked. “Everybody said we wouldn’t see you until tomorrow night.” He pushed off the floor and held out his hand to pull Amanda to her feet. “Staying on the boat, I thought.”

“I’m going to call it a night,” Amanda announced. “Davis, you’re an excellent tag team partner for these kids.”

“Same to you.”

“See you tomorrow. Be prepared for it to be early since…”

Erick interjected, “I was watching you two the last couple rounds. You’ve really been practicing, Mandy.” He stared at her intently.

She nodded. “Yeah, most days.” She grinned up at Davis. “Later, cheater.”

“Cheater! I’ll have you know...”

“No sparring with me?” Erick cut in again. “We haven’t sparred in a long time. Stick around.”

Folding her hands in front of her, she kept her eyes down. “We both know I’m not at your level, Erick. Dakota and Chaz trained you practically from birth. Noel didn’t start with me until I was thirteen.”

“You held your own with Davis. All of us have trained him. It’s the same thing.”

Dropping her hands, she inhaled carefully. “It is not the same thing. He’s my cousin...”

“You didn’t always know that.”

“I felt it.” It was as simple as that for her. “He’s always been like my brother. I’ve always been like a sister to him.”

“I’m not like a brother. Am I, Mandy?”

Davis took a step forward. “Erick...”

“Let her answer the question.” Erick’s eyes stayed on her. “Am I like your brother, Mandy?”

“I go by Amanda now and no, you’re not like a brother. If you’re done making shit hella awkward, I’m going to bed.”

“Spar with me, Amanda.”

“No.”

“Why?”

She walked across the mat and stopped in front of him by the door. She was five-ten and he looked about six-one.

He didn’t intimidate her.

He didn’t make her insides shake.

While Erick had always been her personal weakness – the boy she wanted, the man she wished could be hers – she’d grown used to being the weakness of other boys and men.

When she turned fifteen, her mom asked Noel to talk to her. Zoe didn’t feel she had the same life experience, the history of unusual beauty that made men stupid, to explain her growing worries for her daughter.

“Noel had a chat with me a while back, Erick. Not about periods or the facts of life. It was a talk about who I am from a woman who understands all too well.” From the shelf beside him, she selected a small towel to wipe her face.

“She’s always been pretty, my aunt. Stunning really. The kind of looks that make men dumb, make them weak. They all wanted her until they found out she was deaf. Then, they paused because, goodness, that’s a lot to take on, even for that figure.” Dropping the towel lower, she methodically wiped the sweat off her arms, midsection, upper thighs, and low back.

“When I was fifteen, she explained that I would not experience that same pause. Men will chase you, she said. They’ll start now and it won’t ever stop. They’ll run you to ground if they can, take what you give them if they can’t have it all. You know who you are and you make sure they know, too. Make them pause, not because you’re deaf, but because you’re deaf to them.”

Reaching up, she took down her hair and let it fall around her upper body. Erick’s breath caught but he didn’t move from where he stood with his arms crossed.

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