Page 41 of Ashes

Her chest brushes against mine. "How?" her eyes narrow, “How could you leave me? I loved you, Eli, and you left me. You never even looked back.”

My jaw clenches. She doesn’t know how much I hate myself for leaving her. How her face haunts my dreams every single fucking night. How I wish I could go back to the night of the fire in the basement and take back what I did.

But I can’t. I can’t change anything.

Now, I have to stand by my actions.

She lets out a dramatic huff, “Why did you have suspicious that I might still be alive?”

"I felt guilty for leaving you, and I felt responsible for you ending up in that basement in the first place, so I had someone look into the fire," I admit, telling her something my brothers aren't aware of. I did feel bad for keeping this secret from them, but now I'm finding out that they knew she was alive and never came to me to tell me or even ask for help finding her or finding out what happened.

"Why? You didn't believe that I died?"

"I know you, Tate. I know how fucking resilient you are." A hint of a smile spreads across her face for a brief moment. "I wanted to bury you. It's the least that my brothers deserved. It took a while to get information though. According to all the reports, Tate Dawson died."

"Tate Dawson did die."

"So what? You're back to Lee now, or do you have a new name?"

She laughs, surprising us both. "I'm Lee again. I'm no longer hiding from my past, so I'm myself again."

"Okay, then I'll call you Lee. That name suits you better, anyway."

I reach forward and brush a piece of platinum hair behind her ear. "When I was finally able to track down information, my source confirmed that only two bodies had been discovered. Both male. My source also confirmed that a substantial anonymous donation was received to report that three bodies had been found, one of which was Tate Dawson." I wanted to share the news with my brothers, but I couldn't trust them, so I kept it to myself. "That's when I realized that you were still alive. And honestly, I never really felt like you were dead anyway. I had hoped you were out there somewhere, and I'm glad I was right."

"You're an asshole, Eli. Do you know that? You left me." Sadness washes over her flawless features. "How could you do that? How could you believe I'd betrayed you and was out to get you? I don't understand why you'd think that. After all we shared." I take her always cold hands and lead her toward the sofa, making her sit beside me. "And if you believed I was alive, why didn't you look for me?"

"Honestly, I figured you were too angry and thought if you wanted anything to do with us, you'd come to us." My chest aches to touch her again. "Sayingsorryisn't enough to repair the damage done, but I'd like to try to explain my actions."

"Explain? Don't you mean justify?"

"I'm not trying to justify what I did. I know I turned my brothers against you and hung you out to dry."

"Let's not use cute analogies. Let's say exactly what you did. You turned Ro and King against me, then the three of you left me to die. There's no way to explain that," she says as I grind my teeth.

"You're a piece of shit for doing that. What happened to the guy who built me a ballet studio because I missed dancing? That's the guy I liked. That's the guy I trusted and loved." She waves her hand out in front of her, gesturing toward me. "Whoever the fuck you're becoming isn't anyone that I'll ever like." She walks toward the door but stops with her hand on the doorknob. She looks over her shoulder at me. "By the way, I'm the one responsible for burning your businesses down."

Without another word and without allowing me the chance to speak, she turns on her heel and walks out, leaving me to ponder her words and the fact she's the one responsible for both fires.

I lean back against the couch with wide eyes, and my jaw drops.

Holy fuck.

The longer I sit there, the more I have to think about. And then I realize something.

Lee is right. What happened to the guy that built that dance studio?

Where did he go?

I'd like to find him again.

twenty-one

LEE

"Take a picture. It'll last longer,"Ace says, startling me, his concentration never straying from the canvas in front of him.

"How did you know I was here watching you?" I laugh, walking further into the living room until I'm by his side.

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