Page 83 of Then There Was You

“I hope you end up with the outcome you want, Tay.”

She bumps her shoulder against mine and my stomach churns with nerves.

“Why is it so fucking hard to put yourself out there?”

“Tell me about it,” she mutters.

I’ve been so consumed with my own mess of a love life, I haven’t stopped to ask what’s going on with Ash.

“What’s going on with you and Ben?”

She sighs. “I’ve no idea. I haven’t heard from him since Christmas Eve. I guess I’ll see him when school starts.”

“I’m sorry, Ash.”

She shrugs. “Me too.” She plasters a smile on her face and turns to me. “Let’s get smashed!”

I laugh. “Yeah. Why not? I could do with some Dutch courage.”

I have no idea how I’m going to form the words to tell Seb how I feel, but I know for sure I can’t carry on sleeping with him. It’s too hard. I pushed him into whatever this is between us, promising him sex was all I wanted. Now it’s blown up in my face and I have no one to blame but myself.

CHAPTERTWENTY-NINE

Seb

When I finally lock the door behind the last of the customers, I breathe a sigh of relief that it’s closing time. It’s been one hell of a long night and I want nothing more than to climb into bed with Taylor and fall asleep with her in my arms. I hope she’s still awake. She went up an hour or so ago and looked a little drunk. After Cade, Sophie, Nash, and Paisley left, she Ash and Ivy started on the shots. I served them at least three times, and I know Ryder served them too. If she’s passed out, I have a spare key, but I don’t feel comfortable letting myself in.

After tidying up and saying goodnight to Ryder and Alex, I take the stairs to Taylor’s apartment two at a time before knocking softly on her door. I don’t want to wake her if she’s asleep, no matter how much I want to see her. “Taylor, it’s me. Are you awake?” I say through the wood, hoping she’s in the living room and can hear me. When there’s no response after a couple of minutes, I turn to leave. As I do, the lock clicks and the door opens.

“Did I wake you?” I ask as she stands in the doorway with the comforter wrapped around her.

“I fell asleep on the sofa.”

“I didn’t mean to wake you.”

“That’s okay. Come in.”

She stands to one side, and I walk past her into the living room. When she’s closed the door, I pull her gently into my arms. She tenses, and I lean back, my eyes searching hers.

“What’s wrong?”

She sighs and lowers her eyes. “What are we doing, Seb?” she whispers.

I frown and lift her chin with my fingers. “What do you mean?”

“This.” She gestures between us.

“I thought you knew what we were doing.”

“So did I, but I don’t think I can do it anymore.”

My heart pounds in my chest, and an uneasy feeling washes over me. She steps out of the embrace and my arms fall from around her.

“I thought I could do the wholefriends with benefitsthing…”

She trails off and moves away from me to sit on the edge of the sofa, her head in her hands. I pull my eyebrows together in confusion and go to her, kneeling on the floor in front of the sofa.

“What’s happened? Whatever it is, we can work it out.”