Page 19 of Always Her Cowboy

“Or what? I’m not that same girl who listened to your every command. You don’t get to suddenly decide I exist and expect me to jump back in line like your little soldier who followed you blindly.” My jaw ticks.

“Is that what you think you were?”

“Why else would I be so disposable.”

“You weren’t.” I force the words through my teeth. “You were everything, and for that reason, I had to let you go.”

“What the hell are you talking about?” She tosses her hand up in the air. “You tossed me out like garbage sent to a landfill.”

“I protected you from me.” The words echo through the park, and her eyes grow to the size of a dinner plate.

“What?”

Bending down, I grasp her jaw with my thumb and forefinger. “I wanted everything. Your innocence, body, obedience. You’ve always brought out a side of me that no one else did. It worked when I was your protector, and you were in a neat little box, labeled sort of sister. Then you kissed me and unleashed the beast. I couldn’t get enough of your sweet little mouth or the curves of your body. I didn’t want to stop at eating you out, Daphne. I wanted to take your maidenhead and wear your blood like a badge. If I hadn’t pulled away, you never would’ve left town, and we both know you were meant to go out in the world and explore all the dreams you had in your heart. I couldn’t be responsible for that. Staying away has been one of the hardest things I’ve ever done. But I made my bed and was willing to lie in it.”

Her lips form an o, and her breathing kicks up a notch. “You had your life outside of town, living your dream, and I had the life I created. We were both happy and thriving. It was easier to leave things as they were. Now we can’t. Our lives overlap; we know we’re drawn to each other like magnets.”

“Why are you telling me this?”

“Because you were never the problem, I was. And I was an asshole for letting you think otherwise because I was too damn weak to resist the temptation you presented. I should’ve said this years ago. I can’t go back in time, but I can ask you for a fresh start.” I release her jaw and lower my hands, breathing hard as my heart slaps against my ribs. “I’m sorry, Daph.”

“I don’t.” She shakes her head. “I need time to process.”

“I get that. I want more, but I’ll settle for a truce.”For now.“My son gravitates toward you. You’re talking with mom about purchasing Pages. I want to be a part of all that.”

She sways back, and I grip her waist. “This is a lot. I’m still so pissed at you.”

“And I deserve every moment of your fiery rage. I remember how savage you could be, little one.” Her eyes widen, and she gasps at the sound of the old nickname.

“Don’t.” Her voice cracks, and she pushes away my hands. “None of this fixes things. You didn’t just hurt me. You broke me, New.”

I close my eyes. “It’s the last thing I ever wanted to do.”

“If I was so important, how could you move on so fast?”

“I needed a distraction.”

“Jesus, you married her, Newton.”

“And I loved her in my own way. I was committed, and Ithoughtwe were happy.” I shake my head. “But that’s another story.”

“I don’t know what to say,” She looks away. “I’m still angry.”

“I can work with that.”

“Why would you want to?”

“I’ve missed you, Daph. You’ve been a part of me since you were born. That didn’t stop. You think I didn’t keep tabs on you, or I wasn’t going to come if you needed me?” I shake my head. “I don’t care what’s going on between us. I’ve always been on your side.”

“I hate you for doing this to us.” Tears spill from her eyes and flow down her face.

“I know.” Stepping closer, I wipe away her tears. “I’m going to make it right.” I kiss her forehead, unable to resist touching her more when she’s allowing it.

FOUR

“Are we going to talk about the other night at the bar?” Fey asks as she opens the back door of the forest green SUV.

“Would it matter if I say no?” I ask, sighing.

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