Page 121 of Bad Love

He was withNellie.

“How wasdinner?”

I turn it over. There are so many answers to that question and I try to settle onone.

“I didn’t expect this, Logan. Any of this.” I gesture around the restaurant. “But, I don’t understand why you arranged everything and then didn’t show up. What were youdoing?”

His handsome face clouds with guilt. “We were playingpoker.”

My throat works, and I rub my neck as if I can easeit.

It wasn’t life or death. Logan’s fine. He didn’t make it to dinner because he was playing a game with someone who barely qualifies as afriend.

I force myself to hold his gaze even though I want to look away. I should be grateful Rory wasn’t more disappointed that Logan was late, that he didn’t notice Logan’s smell. But my stomachturns.

I wanted to believe Logan could be the kind of man we need in our lives. The kind who’s reliable, who puts other people ahead of himself. But whatever happened tonight, I’m not sure that’spossible.

Blake used to slip into our lives when it was convenient for him, even when we were under the same roof. He still does, oblivious to the wants and needs ofothers.

Logan sees people. He’s so in tune with them. The fact that he’d do this to Rory, to us, makes my chestache.

"What are we doing here, Logan?” I whisper. “You and me, Imean."

Logan’s jaw tics. "Something great. We're a good team. Rorytoo."

"I don't think that's a good idea." I collect my sweater and wrap it around myself, looking up when I feel Logan’s hands on myarms.

“Why not?” The urgency in his voice has mebristling.

“Logan, I know our life isn’t the easiest to slip into, but I think Rory’s incredible. And the way we live, it works forus.”

“Kendall—”

I shake my head. “The thing is, you can’t half-ass it. You can’t be on board one day and pass the next. You can’t show up with a smile and a credit card and make it all okay. There are no days off in my life. And I can’t afford to be with someone who doesn’t understand that.” I take a shaky breath. “I don’twantto be with someone who doesn’t understandthat.”

Blake never did, and that taught me a lot. I was hoping Logan would be different. I wanted it so desperately. I don’t think I realized how much until this moment. Until my whole body hurt with the realization that I was wrong about what we couldbe.

His brows knit together, a dark slash on his face in the twinkling half light of the restaurant. “I understand, and I’d do anything to show you that. But not everyone’s going to be as perfect as youare.”

My stomach drops like a stone. “I’m notperfect.”

“But you want to be. You want to be the perfect mom and the perfect professional and the perfect daughter. And you try so hard it breaks you, and it hurts me towatch.”

My chest squeezes, and I fight the urge to argue withhim.

I want to grab my son, run out of here, and bury myself in bed and cry for being so stupid. For letting myself get set up to be let downagain.

For making a mistake even bigger than lasttime.

Logan’s gaze works over mine as his thumbs stroke my arms. “Peach, come on. I want this to work with us. All of us. But I’m human. I’m going to screw upsometimes.”

“It’sokay.”

“Yeah?” Hope enters hisvoice.

I nod, feeling lost. “It’s okay for you to do what you want. That’s your right.” I take a slow breath that makes my chest burn. “Logan, what we’ve had, it’s been great. But I don't think it’s a good idea to keep seeing each other after the projectconcludes.”

He curses. “No. No, Kendall—hey.” His expression softens, and I look over my shoulder to see Rory coming out of the bathroom. Logan bends down to hislevel.

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