Page 23 of Finding Their Place

Fuck my life.

I pushed off the couch and took a shower, having heard enough of another guy making my Haley happy. Jealousy turned me into a grump, and I shut myself into my bedroom once I used up all the hot water, pillow over my head to wallow in the shit hole I’d created for myself.

I lived in a mess of my own making, and I didn’t know how to clean up or fix the disaster.

Sleep eventually came, but I dreamed of Haley dancing on the beach, flowers in her hair, her lips smiling for me. Hands beckoning me to play in the lapping waves with her, to just be in the moment of love and contentment from finding where we belonged.

With each other.

I woke hard and just as brokenhearted as I’d been the night before.

And shit only got worse.

Haley never crawled out of bed before me on mornings she didn’t have to open Pieces, but she met me in the kitchen with a steaming cup of coffee and bright eyes. “Morning!”

I couldn’t bring myself to smile at her odd display of early jolliness, but I at least thanked her for the hot mug.

“Did you get off with him over the phone last night or something?” I muttered and slumped onto the couch, keeping my back to her so she wouldn’t see how her happiness over Wyatt knifed at my chest.

“We definitely could have but chose not to. I’m telling you—” Haley melted onto the couch beside me with a ridiculous sigh, cradling her coffee in her hands “—he’s definitely got my mind and panties all twisted up.”

“He’s one hell of a catch, huh?” I asked, my tone bland, thank fuck.

“A girl can hope, right?”

I didn’t need to glance her way to know she had hearts in her eyes and a dreamy smile on her lips that I had fantasized of kissing since the day we’d met.

“We’re going out to dinner tonight,” she tacked on and took a sip of her coffee while curling her bare legs beneath her body.

Fuck.

“What happened to getting to know each other over the phone for a few weeks?” I definitely sounded like a moody prick.

“We’ve connected. Really hit it off. I went with honesty like you suggested and unloaded all the shit of my life into his ear. He didn’t run away. Asked me questions—told me he was there for me if I ever needed to talk. I’m feeling really good about taking the next step.” She didn’t sound as though she’d picked up on my mood or the dented skin between my eyes.

Haley tended to fall fast and hard for guys and regretted her choices more often than not when considering more than a hookup.

Uneasiness slithered atop my heartache, and I hated myself for having told her to be vulnerable. It’s what had made me lose my heart to her too. “Just be careful, okay? Don’t go back to his place—and text me his license plate number.”

Haley leaned over and kissed my bare shoulder.

I refused to focus on the softness of the caress on my skin that blazed fire through my veins. “Better yet, bring him back here like you said you and Lily always used to do with hookups.”

“Ew. I do not want you to hear us and have you fantasizing about being the one impaled by Wyatt’s dick.”

Jealousy stirred like a hornet’s nest, wiping all other emotions from my head, and I forced myself to enjoy a swallow of coffee before I spoke and ousted exactly how I felt.

“I really wish you weren’t gay, Garrett Moore,” Haley said before I could think of a reply.

I choked on my mouthful of coffee and coughed a few times while she beat her fist on my back. “Why’s that?” I asked, my voice rasped from the hot liquid going down the wrong tube.

“Because if you weren’t, I could almost believe in happily ever afters,” she said with a sigh, once more sinking into the couch.

My mouth opened to spill my guts—and I snapped my jaw shut just as fast. I’d already dug my grave with Haley. Admitting to lying to her for the previous eight months would put me on her shit list, ruining the near-perfect man she believed me to be.

No more best friend, no more snuggle bug, and definitely no more roof over my head.

Stomach churning and chest tight, I swallowed hard, hating what I was about to do. “I’m hooking up with a guy tonight—met him on Grindr,” I tossed out, forcing myself to sound nonchalant in continuing on with my bullshit life.

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