Page 5 of Finding Their Place

I thought I’d found the latter in Alec, but Haley, my prickly cuddle bug…well, I wished things were different.

Much different.

I longed for complete honesty between us, to spill my guts, but I wasn’t willing to lose her. Having been kicked out of Alec’s life, Haley had become my everything. Best friend. Confidant for all but that one bit of truth about my greatest mistake, and the unrequited love that ached my entire body. She was the lifeline who kept me from drowning—even though she claimed to need a buoy of her own to cling to.

Insecurities weaseled into my brain like they always did when I thought too hard on how I’d lied to her about my sexuality, and I crunched my lollipop down to the gum.

Yes, I liked men and had told her as such, but I’d left out the part about finding women sexy as hell too.

Especially Haley Foster with her dark eyes and constantly changing hair color. The current purplish-red in a messy bun atop her head was one of my favorites. It pulled out the same hints of color from her irises. Add in her petite body, the flash in her eyes whenever her little claws came out, and stick a goddamn fork in me, I was done.

A heavy sigh sent me deeper into the couch.

“Are you okay?” Haley dragged her fingernails over my temple and down the scruff lining my jaw.

I fought off the blood wanting to rush straight to my dick again. “No.”

“Give it to me.”

Fuck, when she said those words…

I bit back a groan and focused on what she really asked for—an unloading of my thoughts.

“I’m thankful I have a job,” I started, “even if it is washing dishes at the busiest diner I’ve ever set foot into, but it’s not fulfilling in the least bit. Yes, it pays the bills—barely—but this isn’t what I want for my life. I had high hopes. Big dreams.”

Haley didn’t offer me bullshit encouragement about it not being my time yet, that I would make it one day.

I wasn’t good enough, bottom line.

For Hollywood or for her.

One stupid mistake had ruined my life, and I wasn’t about to tell her the truth and screw up what I had found as her roommate.

“Life is good,” I stated quietly, knowing I ought to really think so. “But I want more. A real-life happily ever after with someone I’m hopelessly in love with.”

“You will.” Haley pinched my cheek gently. “You’re too damn cute to stay single for long.”

The problem was, I couldn’t have the one I wanted.

We were stuck in friendship land.

“When’s the last time you went on a date?” I asked, expecting we had to be in the same boat since I’d never seen her go out.

“Nine months ago.”

“Shit. Seriously?”

“Yeah.”

I angled my head back to catch her gaze. “Hookups?”

“Eight months.”

“Shit.” I grinned, chewing obnoxiously on my gum to annoy her. “Those battery-operated boyfriends in your bedside table must be getting a workout. Not that I haven’t heard the truth of that for myself.”

She punched my arm, scowling down at me.

“Ow.” I feigned being hurt, rubbing my shoulder. “Okay, so maybe I haven’t.”

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