Page 105 of Finding Their Place

Even though I hungered for—belonged to Wyatt in some ways, I yearned to do what she wanted. That meant leaving him behind for however long it took to settle things with my cuddle bug. Yet a part of me still stood in the kitchen beside him.

Working alongside him, sharing space and most of our thoughts, had come easily between us. We’d clicked beyond that initial moment of bonding, falling into a comfortable rhythm inside and out of his bed that I’d made myself at home in.

But until I straightened shit out with my Haley, I couldn’t move forward with the longing I felt for him that wouldn’t fade.

Heart in my throat, I moved through the kitchen Haley and I had shared for the best months of my life, noting the dirty dishes on the counter, the unswept kitchen floor.

A lone lamp lit the living room, the same one she often left on if I stayed out late after she’d gone to bed. Two piles of unfolded of laundry sat on the chair, and the throw blanket we’d used to cuddle beneath lay tossed over the back of the couch.

The toilet flushed, and I stood in the kitchen, listening as feet shuffled across the hallway—but she didn’t shut her bedroom door behind her.

I let out a slow exhale of air I hadn’t realized I’d held in my lungs. Setting my bag on the kitchen floor, I kicked off my shoes. Put my keys and dead cell phone on the counter.

One last deep inhale in attempts to steady my nerves, and I walked through our apartment on near-silent feet.

The lamp on her bed stand revealed Haley lay wrapped up in her comforter, maroon-red hair still atop her head in a messy bun.

She had her back to me.

Deep longing to just hold her, breathe her in, welled up inside me, and I moved forward without thought, my soul so damn hungry to comfort her I couldn’t breathe.

She didn’t shift or acknowledge my presence as I pulled back the blankets on the opposite side of her. She didn’t make a peep as I slid in behind her warm body.

But a heavy sigh sagged her against me as I wrapped her up in my arms.

Eyes stinging, I buried my face against her neck and breathed in the clean scent of her skin. A sense of rightness rolled over me, thickening my throat.

“I’m sorry,” I whispered, not bothering with any excuses.

Haley rolled over to face me. Red-rimmed eyes peered at me, her nose a bright shade like she’d spent too long on the beach without sunscreen.

She’d been crying.

Tears welled in my eyes, and hers responded in kind.

“He told you about my mom.” Haley didn’t ask a question, but I nodded and hugged her tight, not bothering to offer my condolences. She wouldn’t want them, same as I didn’t over my teenage mother who’d chosen death rather than her son.

Haley and I had always been close, but that news had made me want to wrap her up inside my arms for eternity.

“Need to talk about it?”

“No.”

I brushed my nose over hers, allowing her the space she needed to deal with whatever grief or regrets she might have. “I missed you.”

“Same.” Her attempted smile wobbled as her eyes once more welled. “I’m sorry for overreacting like I did.”

“It’s okay, Hal—”

“No it’s not.” A tear slid down her cheek as her voice cracked. “You’re my best friend. My koala. And I almost lost you for being butt hurt over something stupid.”

“It wasn’t stupid. I made a serious mistake by not being honest with you from the start.”

She blew out a heavy exhale. “But I wouldn’t have given you Lily’s room if I was aware you might attempt to get in my pants.”

We studied each other in the dim light, and I knew we both followed the logic from her statement onward.

There wouldn’t have been nights spent snuggling on the couch. The traumas of our childhood shared over countless glasses of wine. No teasing, no sexual banter I’d had a love/hate relationship with.

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