Page 38 of Wildest Desire

“Lexi.” I hear Ethan calling my name and I slowly open my eyes. “We’re home,” he says, bent down next to my open car door.

Rubbing my eyes to wake up a little bit, I realize that even though I only slept about five minutes, I still feel a little bit better.

Dropping on the couch, I turn to face Ethan. “Do you want to ask questions?” I ask him. I would like him to ask them now, so I won’t have to talk about this day again. “I don’t like talking about it, but…”

“How about you tell me what you want to tell me,” Ethan says, taking a sip of his whiskey.

I don’t know where to start. I don’t want him knowing the wrong choices I’ve made and what they’ve cost me. I’ve learned to look past them—to live with them.

“I’ll tell you, then you can make your choice with what you want to happen between us, but I don’t want it mentioned again. Yes, I’m running from my past again, but I feel safer that way,” I tell him, taking my shoes off and putting them on the couch close to my body.

“Okay.”

Looking at him for a moment, I wonder if he’s ever felt lost before; if he’s ever felt this much pain. I mean, he's a businessman, so he’s bound to have felt pain when he loses a business plan or something. But, has he ever been hurt personally?

“Everyone makes stupid decisions, and I made mine when I was eighteen. I dated the bad boy who my parents hated. He was nineteen and...” I stop talking, thinking about how to carry on with this conversation. “At one of the parties we went to, we were drinking and thought it would be funny to get married, but it wasn’t funny. We got back, and my parents went crazy and told me that I made the mistake so I had to live with it.” I walk over to the kitchen to get a drink of water. Ethan stays standing with his back to me. I have to tell him why I keep running and that only makes me scared of what can happen if I stay here.

Sitting back down next to him, I finish telling him my life story. “My parents told me that if I was old enough to get married, then I was old enough to move out and find a place of our own. Anyway, the honeymoon phase times lasted a month, and then it all came down fast. Like my dad said, a relationship that starts fast, will end just as fast. He began drinking, started doing drugs again, and the abuse started up. My brother came once, and fought him and told him that if he touched me again it would be the last thing he did. It didn’t stop him. Then my brother had enough and he and my dad took me back home. I was able to get a divorce because we couldn’t find him and he didn’t answer the publication summons. The divorce didn’t matter to Sam, though. He still found me and harassed me every day. Sam found me and came for me every day. Once, he even got me when I was coming out of the grocery store, but I ran away when the manager came out after seeing Sam trying to drag me to the car.”

Walking over to the window, I start rubbing my head. I feel Ethan standing next to me. “My name used to be Teresa Campbell, then it was Jessica Jones, then it was Lizzie Taylor. Now I’m Lexi Jackson, and tomorrow, I'll be someone new.”

“You’ll be staying Lexi Jackson. He knows where you are now. Do you think Dan, Jon, Jackie or I'll let him get close to you?” Ethan asks, looking out of the window.

I start laughing to myself. “You think I’m worried about what he’s going to do to me? I’m not. If it keeps my family safe, I don’t care what he does to me.” I turn to face him. “He came to the house for me, and my dad told him that if he touched me that he would kill him.” I take a deep breath. “He told my father that the only way he would leave, was with me. He took a step toward me so my dad took one in front of me.” My voice starts to get shaky again, and I feel Ethan’s thumb on my cheek wiping the tears away, “I stood there and watched him shoot my dad. I watched my father die in front of me because I wouldn’t go with him. Before he ran, he told me that he would always find me, and if anyone got in his way the same would happen to them.” Shivers run through my body, and Ethan sees it too. Taking his jacket off, he wraps it around my shoulders. “After my dad’s funeral, Dan gave me money and told me to go, and not tell anyone where I was, and if I wanted to call him to only use pay-phones at least an hour or so away.” I walk back over to the couch, “I did and he found me, then I did it again and he found me. Sam always finds me.” I lean back into the sofa.

“Maybe now is the time to stop running and finally live. I’ve seen you not care about anything and live,” Ethan tells me sitting back down next to me.

“That was when I knew he wasn’t here. Now, I'll be looking over my shoulder, waiting for him to show his face—”

“Get that thought out of your head. I won’t let you leave, or let him come near you. So, forget leaving and start living,” Ethan says not looking at me and I don’t turn to face him either.

I’m too tired to talk about this with him. I have to talk to Dan first and make sure he knows what I’m planning on doing. I won’t do anything unless he’s on the same page as me.

* * *

I’m not even sure when I fell asleep last night. Opening my eyes, I look around and see I'm in Ethan’s room. Why am I in his room?

Going to the bathroom, I brush my teeth and freshen up. Walking out of the bedroom, I hear Ethan raising his voice at someone. I stop for a minute to listen to what they're saying.

“My company, my rules, and if I want all my meetings here, then that’s where they'll fucking be.”

“Yes, Mr. Knight. Is this where you would like me to be or—”

“Go to the office. If I need you here, I'll call,” Ethan snaps, cutting Selena off. He’s not being very nice to her at all.

“Yes, sir. There have also been a lot calls from Angie. She said it’s very important that you talk to her.”

“I don’t care,” Ethan coldly replies to her.

“Yes, sir. Also, Emily called. She needs to talk to you about something very important,” Selena tells him.

“Another fucking reason why she's saying no to me,” Ethan bites back.

I have no idea what's happening between those two and why she hates him so much, but it’s not going well for Ethan.

“She said she would like to talk to you about a man named Edward Cult. What—”

“Tell her to fuck off,” he cuts her off again.

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