Page 53 of My Best Friend's Triplet Brothers

Lucas dropped Milo just to pull back and slam his fist into Milo’s face. Blood instantly poured from his nose, but he was out. Lucas dropped him to the floor and turned to me. “I should’ve hit him sooner. I’m sorry.”

Andrew slammed his fist into the wall, leaving a big hole, before walking to me and roughly pulling me into his chest. “He’s wrong. Nothing he said is true, baby.”

Warren grunted in agreement. “You’re an angel, Cupcake. Everything about you is perfect. You can’t listen to him.”

My heart was hammering away, my eyes leaking tears without me even realizing it. I couldn’t stop hearing Milo’s words. Why the words of someone trying to hurt me meant more in that moment than the words of three men who cared for me, I didn’t know. Whore. Slut. Disgusting.

“Cupcake. Look at me.” Andrew’s voice was harsh as he took my chin in his hand and lifted my face to his. “Stop it. You’re none of those things. His small mind doesn’t get this. That doesn’t mean it’s wrong.”

I shook my head. “Then why do we have to hide it? Even without Macy, I mean. We wouldn’t broadcast it. It would be a secret, still, wouldn’t it?”

Warren sighed. “It’s not that easy.”

I moved away from them, my heart breaking as I did. “I have to go.”

Lucas moved towards me. “Cupcake, no. Please. Just talk to us. We’ll get rid of him and talk this through.”

I shook my head and edged around them. “I have to be alone.”

“Baby, don’t close us out.” Andrew reached for me, but I hurried to open the door. “Fuck.”

“I’m sorry,” I muttered without looking back at them before hurrying out of the room and down the hall. I ran to my room and didn’t even get inside before I was sobbing. Locking the door to make sure they couldn’t get it, even with the key card, I went straight to my bathroom and turned the shower on as hot as it’d go.

The realization slammed through me that I hadn’t even been so upset when I’d stumbled in on Milo screwing someone else. I’d thought I was in love with him, but it hadn’t hurt. What I was feeling after walking away from the triplets was devastating. It wasn’t even about what people might call me when they found out. It was just walking away from them. They’d made me happier than I could remember being, ever. Spending time with them felt like getting to fly a little closer to the sun without getting burned.

I’d fallen hard for them. It was stupid and messy and had been doomed from the beginning, but it was true. Cursing my stupid heart and inability to keep things light with them, I stripped down and got in the shower. I wanted to cry without fear of anyone hearing. I wanted to cry until it didn’t hurt so much.

I stood under the hot water until my skin was bright red and waterlogged. Still, I hurt. Sinking onto the tile bench, I held my face in my hands and shook as the cold air of the room chilled me to the bone. I didn’t know what to do. I didn’t have anyone to talk to about it. I just had to suffer alone.

I knew I deserved that for what I’d done to Macy. I probably deserved everything I was feeling. What had I been thinking? I couldn’t have a relationship with three men. Especially Macy’s brothers. How selfish was I?

Wrapping my arms around my body, I forced myself to get out of the shower and dry off. I meant to get dressed, but I didn’t have the energy. Instead, I curled up in a bed that smelled like the three men I was aching over. I was wide awake, unable to sleep through the ache I was feeling. All I could do was stare up at the ceiling and go through the thousand scenarios I was imagining.

In a different life, maybe I could’ve been their fourth. We could’ve lived our lives together and been happy. There could’ve been a happy house with a giant bed and maybe even more. Nights spent in that bed, but even more nights spent on the couch together, laughing and talking. I could’ve learned even more about them. I’d never know so many things.

Tossing around in my bed, I pressed my palms into my eyes and tried to stop thinking. If I could just shut my brain off, maybe I’d be okay. It didn’t feel that way. It felt like I’d never be okay.

Cursing, I sat up and gripped the blanket in my fingers. It wasn’t fair. I’d spent so much time fighting what was happening that I hadn’t experienced enough. I wanted to scream. I wanted to cry more. I wanted to find Macy and have her hold me while I cried like all the times before when I’d gone to her sad about one thing or another. I wanted to wake up and not have feelings for three men who were completely off-limits.

Whore. Slut. Milo’s words settled into my brain and I grabbed at my hair, frustrated. Twisting into my brain, those words threatened the beauty that was being with the three men at the same time. It started to look like something dirty, something wrong. Even as I sat there, multiple places on my body sore from being used and pleasured, the edges of the picture started to dinge.

I hid in my room that night, too afraid to chance facing the triplets after walking away from them. There was also the fear that Milo had told everyone. Macy would hate me. Everyone would hate me. It would ruin Macy’s wedding. She’d never forgive me. I didn’t want to lose my best friend. She’d been there for me since we were in kindergarten. She was my platonic soulmate.

I sat with the pain of knowing that if Macy never spoke to me again, it was all my fault. I’d let myself put her feelings aside for my own selfish desires. I’d willingly and knowingly walked into her brothers’ rooms and done things that would scandalize even some porn stars. It wasn’t a fun thing to sit with, but I couldn’t think of anything other than the guys, and that didn’t feel any better.

The next day I didn’t leave my room. I ignored the texts and calls. I ate the leftovers in my minifridge and spent most of the day curled up in bed, crying. Knocks rang out on my door, but I couldn’t face anyone.

The day after, I couldn’t keep it up. The rehearsal was in the afternoon, followed by a big dinner with everyone. Then, after that, there was a joint bachelor and bachelorette party. If Macy didn’t hate me, I had to be there for her. Her wedding was the day after, and she deserved her best friend to show up for her. If she didn’t hate me.

I got ready for the rehearsal, a headache nagging at me, and forced myself to not show up in all black, no matter how I felt. I had so much guilt as I walked into the ballroom. Guilt that I’d vanished on everyone. Guilt that I’d been a bad friend. Guilt that I’d slept with all three of Macy’s brothers during her wedding. And guilt that I’d maybe hurt Andrew, Lucas, and Warren’s feelings. I knew they’d called. They’d texted. They’d knocked on my door and called out to me. They tried to reach me and I’d ignored them.

I expected someone to shout that the slut had arrived and to have people start pelting me with old tomatoes. I expected Macy to look me in the eye and tell me she hated me. I took a deep breath and walked farther into the room, attempting to join the wedding party.

My hopes at blending in died a fast death as a gasp filled the giant ballroom and a loud voice rang out, calling everyone’s attention to me.

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