Page 61 of Hell Hath No Fury
"Who the hell are they?" I ask, more than a little confused.
"Malcolm Saint. Manwhore by Katy Evans? Christian Grey. Fifty Shades of Grey? Fifty shades was made into movies? He drew up a… never mind." She huffs again.
"Not ringing a bell."
She rolls her eyes. "Lord. No wonder you're so bad at this. You need to pick up a romance novel or two about rich guys who know how to handle the, as you call them, clingers."
The door flies open and in walk Mark and Alex.
"I have a better idea," Mark informs us, coffee in hand, looking like the cat who just ate the mouse.
"Save me. Someone," I mutter.
"It's what I'm trying to do," Mark tells me.
Was I doing that bad? I wonder. Alex nods, as if he knows my thoughts.
"Wait. Were you listening this whole time?" I ask.
They look at me with a pronounced, "duh".
"Have you no shame?" Audra asks.
"Not one ounce," Mark admits.
She sighs. "I knew that already. Why did I bother asking?"
"I'm not sure," Alex tells her. "But let's get back to the topic at hand."
"Sure. Why not? Have at it then, since I so obviously suck," I agree.
"You kinda do," Alex whispers.
I flip him off and he chuckles.
"Here's what you should do. This is fool proof," Mark says.
"Fool proof," Audra murmurs.
"Since you think Derrick doesn't know what he's doing in the area of dating—"
"Were we talking about dating? Or using women?" Audra interrupts.
Mark gives her a bland look. "Since you think Derrick doesn't know what he's doing in the area of dating, you could teach him."
"Huh?" I ask.
"Kind of like Dating 101, if you will," Alex adds.
"Dating 101. I don't think he'd pass that class," Audra declares.
"That's not fair," I reply.
"Life isn't fair, hence why I'm sitting in your shirt and robe not having a clue how I got here or who took my clothes off," she glares at each of us and Mark grins happily.
"Never gonna tell. But, yeah. Dating 101. You'd go out on dates. Audra could teach you how to let a woman down easy, and how to effectively kick them out the door the next morning—leaving no room for error."
"Error?" I question. "How the hell can someone get dating wrong?"
