Page 14 of Twisted Redemption

Charlie won’t mind, my ass. Is that what David said about me? Did that woman believe him? Did he believe himself? And why did I want to believe Blaze?

Forget how I’ve felt for Blaze since childhood. I thought it would fade when I started dating David, and then when I got engaged to him, but it didn’t. But I never acted on it. Dating one of my brother’s best friends? Absolutely off the table. Alex would throw a fit. Doesn’t matter if Blaze has always meant everything to me.

But now look at me. I kissed another woman’s fiancé. I did exactly to Charlie what another woman did to me—what brought me to the lowest point in my life, ever. And that includes all the shitty things Francis ever said to me.

Dad. What would he think of me if he was still alive? What would he say if he saw me like this? Probably something about not being good enough to be a man’s main woman or some shit like that.

I close my eyes against the thought. What my father thought of me didn’t matter, even when he was alive. I learned that lesson too late, but I still did.

Now all that matters is that I’ve severely fucked up. Sure, Blaze may have played a role too—Charlie is his fiancée. But I didn’t move. I didn’t back up when he lowered his face until he was a mere inch away. All I could think about was that he held me today like we were friends again. He helped me move. He made sure I couldn’t drive when I was crying and probably would’ve crashed my car.

And even more than that, he cared. When he saw what David did to my house, he was so angry.

It had been all my stupid feelings needed to come crashing back full force. For a moment, I forgot about David. I forgot about Charlie. All that existed was me and Blaze.

Had I had the same effect on him? Or is he just as horrible as David? As my father?

No. You’ve known him his entire life. He’s not like them.

But even before I’ve finished the thought, his cold, unfeeling eyes flash through my mind. He stopped caring about me months ago. I’ve been a fool to think otherwise.

With a sigh, I reach up and turn off the water. I may want to sit here all evening stewing in self-hatred, but I promised Liling I’d go out with her tonight, and I need to start getting ready.

With the enthusiasm of a student during finals week, I blow dry and then curl my brown hair. I’ve always hated it—not blonde like Sophia’s, but not dark enough to be considered a pretty brunette. Just brown. Dishwater blonde if you’re an asshole like my father.

I know I’m pretty. I didn’t when I was in high school, but I do now. But my hair? Yeah, no. Always hated it.

I grab my phone and put on some music, hoping to drown out the thoughts of my father, and David, and now Blaze. I sing along halfheartedly, trying to find any excitement for my night out.

Maybe once Liling gets here.

By the time I’ve finished my hair and makeup, thrown on a pair of skinny jeans and a cute halter crop top, I’m ready for a better distraction than my go-to pop playlist.

Thankfully, Liling doesn’t take too long to show up. She’s in a tiny black dress that contrasts her pale skin, her black hair pulled up into an elaborate bun.

“Oh good, you’re ready. I invited the gang out, they’re meeting us at the bar.” She stands on my front porch, hand propped on her hip, looking like a princess.

“The more the merrier,” I say, closing my door and locking it.

Then we’re off, both of us singing along to some stupid song while Liling’s driver grimaces at our off-tune voices.

But I don’t care. I need a distraction, and Liling knows how to have a good time. She also knows how to listen to me when I need to vent, although I’m not sure that’ll happen tonight.

Tonight, I just want to forget.

THE BAR IS CROWDED and loud, but thankfully Liling reserved us a table outside. It’s already full with faces I mostly recognize from my college classes, on the corner of the fenced-in deck overlooking a small lake.

With a smile, I step toward the ledge, leaning on the railing. I used to live in this lake during the summertime, splashing with Alex and the Graysons while our moms lounged on the beach. Those were happy memories.

Blaze’s signature grin flashes in my memory, and the simple reminder of him makes me remember that I forgot to arm my security system before I left with Liling.

Shit.

I really have been trying to remember to turn it on. But I’d be kidding myself if I said that’s the only reason I’m not trying harder to get better at it.

Call if you need anything. And don’t forget to set the alarm when I leave.

Why can’t he care like that all the time?

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