Page 24 of Easy To Lose

“As much as we appreciate the gesture, we like our privacy,” he says with a wink just as Charly rounds the corner and gives him the eye.

“You guys talking about me?” she teases, leaning into Simon’s embrace. I smile as he kisses the top of her head. “So,” she says, looking at me, “when are we going shopping?” She can’t be serious.

“Aren’t you tired?” I ask, looking at Simon, who looks like he might fall over at any second. She just shakes her head, looking up at Simon and realizing that he might be dead on his feet. “On second thought, maybe we should do that tomorrow.” I nod my head, and Simon shakes his.

“Charly honey, go. I’ll head back to the hotel and rest.” She eyes him with a concerned gaze, and he just bends to kiss her lightly. They share some whispered words as I head back out to the floor and check to make sure Becca is good for the night.

“You good? I’m going out with Charly. I have my cell if you need anything.” Becca gives me that I know, Mom look, and I smile. “Okay,” I say, holding up my hands. “Just don’t burn the place down,” I joke.

“Don’t worry, I have like three other things on my to-do list before that happens.” I shake my head, both loving her and annoyed by her at the same time.

“Funny. Just call if anything happens, okay?” She nods as Charly comes out of the back, Simon following not far behind.

“Let’s go!” Charly squeals, leaving Simon’s hand behind and taking mine instead. “Bye, Simon!” she says as we leave the store and head down the boardwalk.

“So, where are we going?” she asks as I bask in the feel of the sunshine on my face. I’ve spent so much time inside the store or inside Owen’s gym that I keep forgetting there’s a thing called daylight.

“Well, I had this idea…” My heart starts beating because I’ve been planning this for a few days, and I know it can either go very, very well—or incredibly badly.

“I’m listening,” Charly says, taking my arm as I lead us to the end of the street. When we stop in front of the store, her eyes light up. When I tell her my plan, her eyes light up even more, and a sneaky smile crosses her face. “Girl, you are in for a world of trouble when you get home.” I wink, opening the door and walking in.

I’m surrounded by lace, colors, textures, and shapes, and when I wipe my hands on the leg of my jeans, the nerves start to set in.

“Calm down, it’s just lingerie,” Charly mutters as she takes my hand and leads me to the back of the store where I can tell they keep the more out-there sets. “If you’re so nervous, why did you want to do this?” she asks as I flip through a see-through black number that comes with a garter belt and panties with a gaping hole in them.

Nope. Not for me.

“Owen won’t give in. I’ve tried everything, including begging for sex, but he keeps saying he wants me to know that he likes me for more than just that.” Charly eyes me, and I can’t help when mine roll into the back of my head. “I know, it makes him even more perfect. But when a girl is this frustrated, she’ll do almost anything…” I keep the fact that it’s been almost a year since a man has even come close to having sex with me to myself. Honestly, the idea of Owen doing just that has been a feature in my spank bank for the past few weeks, but I want the real thing. I need the real thing before I go insane.

“Here.” Charly hands me a few outfits and points to the changing room. “Try them on, take a picture, and send them to him. I guarantee the minute he gets them, he won’t be saying no to you for much longer.” Her eyebrows rise and fall, and I laugh as I head into the room and finally look at what she handed me.

The red one is a simple baby doll top with a thong that leaves very little to the imagination. Then there’s the purple one-piece that is modest but very sexy in its own right. But the moment I see the white set, I know it’s the one. I pull out my phone and text Owen.

Me: Is there anything I can say to make you change your mind about the sex stuff?

It’s to the point, and I know he might take it the wrong way. I’m hoping he answers the way I expect, because that’s the only way this is going to work.

Owen: Were you thinking of persuading me?

He’s teasing, and I can’t help the smile.

Me: I was thinking of getting something nice to wear tonight for when you come over.

I change into the white number, look at myself in the mirror, and wonder for the seven-thousandth time today what the hell I’m doing. I don’t do this. I don’t wear skimpy lingerie. I don’t expose myself this way to anyone, let alone the guy I’ve been pining for since I was sixteen. When I look in the mirror, I expect to see my imperfections. I anticipate my eyes falling to my stomach. I imagine my fingers pulling at the fabric, making it so it’s easier to cover more of my body. But what actually happens makes my breath hitch, and my hands start to tremble. Because what I notice in the mirror isn’t the fat girl that every guy before wanted me to see. What I see is the curvy woman Owen’s hands grab for every time we’re in the same room together. I notice a woman who isn’t a size two but looks damn good in white lace. And then I realize in that moment that no matter how much weight I lose, no matter what size my jeans’ tag says, at the end of the day, Owen likes the Morgan Lawson that’s staring back at me in the mirror.

And that’s enough.

For now.

When Owen sends back a heart emoji, I take one last look at myself in the mirror and do something I swore I would never do. I open up my camera, snap a picture, and try not to overthink it. Instead, I send it to Owen before I change my mind.

I redress in my work clothes and head out into the store where Charly is waiting. When she sees that I’m still carrying the white lace, she gives me a knowing look.

“I knew you’d pick that one. He’s going to go insane when he sees you.” She winks as we stand in line to pay. When my phone vibrates in my hand, I glance down to see what Owen said. When I do, I almost drop my phone.

Owen: You have no idea what you just started.

Chapter 20

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