Page 49 of The B!tch List

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Fucknuckle

Bronocchio

Ifelt like I’d been defiled. I smelled like a cheap brothel and was pretty sure I was pregnant with the amount of testosterone that Ruthie Grey has running around her body. I had to wonder how I’d ever got myself involved with her. Right, her tits and ass had something to do with it. They weren’t in Nancy’s league, but then the time I first hooked up with Ruthie I had no idea how spectacular Nancy’s tits and ass were. Ruthie was mildly less annoying than Nancy, but that made for things to be a little boring. In truth the only thing we had in common was sex. She was pretty good at it, yet weirdly once again she was second place to Nancy. Anyways, the point was that Ruthie had basically humped me in the alleyway between the food market and Stars & Stripes. She caught me unawares and dragged me off the street and begged me to tell her what Nancy had bid for the old bank. Obviously, I denied the opportunity to help her. Aside from being a professional, I didn’t want Ruthie opening some bar that would have the women of Dayton going crazy over half-dressed men. It wouldn’t even entice shiny new women into town; we were hardly a party destination. Now if she’d decided to open it in Middleton Ridge I could understand it, but Dayton was not going to make her a millionaire.

She was insistent and I was lucky to come out alive. Alive and with my manhood still intact. Once I told her that I wouldn’t be giving up the amount of Nancy’s bid she grabbed ahold of my dick and gave it a squeeze, well it was more a vise like clamping which when I get chance I will inspect for bruising.

“Hey, honey,” Mom said as I closed the front door behind me. “I just put Tia down she was dead on her feet even though I know you wanted to see her before bed.”

I felt a thread of disappointment run through me. “Oh, okay.”

Mom cleared her throat. “There’s a letter on the kitchen table for you.”

“What?” I could tell by the look on her face what it was.

“It’s here.” She rubbed my arm. “How do you feel, honey?”

“I don’t know.” I shrugged.

“Go and open it and then we’ll see what we’re dealing with.”

I nodded. “Yep. Open it and then decide what we need to do.”

“Dad will be home soon. He’ll know what to do

I nodded again, bent to kiss Mom’s cheek and then went to find out my destiny.

Walking into the kitchen the only thing that I could see was the white envelope propped up against the ugly salt and pepper shakers that my mom had on the table. They were given to her by my grandma just as she started with Alzheimer’s and as they were the last gift she gave to Mom before she went into the nursing home, we had to use them. Have you ever seasoned your dinner with a naked Santa and Mrs. Claus?

“Here goes,” I whispered as I picked up the envelope and stared down at it.

My feelings were such a one-eighty from when I first heard about Tia that it was making me wonder if someone had slipped me something in my food. Maybe it was Mrs. Devonshire to be sure she didn’t have to keep Tia.

“Shaw, honey just open it.”

I turned to see Mom standing in the doorway and she was clutching Tia’s blanky. Her eyes were wide, and she was chewing on her bottom lip. If this said Tia wasn’t mine, I was pretty sure she was going to be devastated.

I took a deep breath and ripped open the envelope and pulled out the letter, skimming to the important part. Shit. My breath was ragged, and my hands shook as I tried to get my emotions under control. The whooshing sound in my ears was probably loud enough for Mom to hear.

“Well?”

I swung around to face her and let my hand drop to my side as I took a deep breath.

“Oh Shaw, I knew that you’d fallen in love with her, but I didn’t want to say anything.” She made a move towards me, but I held up my hand.

“No, Mom.” For the first time in forever, I felt tears forming. Mom gasped, I looked down at the paper and then back up. “She’s mine, Mom. Tia is mine.”

My five feet three mom ran and tackled me, almost knocking me over as she squealed with joy.

“Ssh,” I said around a laugh as she clung to me. “You’ll wake Tia.”

“Oh, who cares. She’s yours, Shaw, and she’s so damn beautiful. I didn’t want to say it and tempt fate, but I think she looks just like Austen when he was little, except she doesn’t have that lazy eye thing going on. Good thing we used Grandpa’s eye patch because that worked a treat on him—”

“Mom. Mom, calm down.” I wrapped her in my arms and hugged her tightly. “Shit, my life is going to totally change.”

She pulled back and looked up at me. “I know, honey, but we’ll be here to help you. Dad already said that we’ll go shopping at the weekend for anything she needs. And Bronte will get over the fact that she hasn’t had the first grandchild and first granddaughter in the family.”