Page 39 of The B!tch List

A girl I think was named Peggy ran on with the trophy and a gold envelope and handed them to Carter. Before she left, she turned to Austen, winked and blew a kiss.

“Shaw,” I whispered. “What the hell has your brother been doing to the girls in this town?”

He looked at Austen who was running his tongue along his top lip and looking Peggy up and down.

“I have no fucking clue. It’s like the kid has a golden penis all of a sudden.”

I chuckled because Shaw sounded a little more affronted than he should. I was still giggling when a gold, two-handled cup was thrust into my arms.

“You get this one and I’ll order another for Shaw, unless you want six months each.”

“Nope, want my own,” Shaw said, crossing his arms over his chest.

“Fine.” Carter sighed and then ripped open the envelope and pulled out some of the vouchers. “These are yours, and these are yours.” He then pushed the open envelope against Shaw’s chest and then turned to the audience. “And that folks, is it. Thank you and good night.”

Carter then dropped the mic’ and practically ran from the stage leaving the mayhem behind him.

I looked at Shaw and he looked at me and we both shrugged.

“Fancy spending a couple of those vouchers at Stars & Stripes?” I asked, feeling magnanimous. Plus, he looked kinda hot and I was pretty sure that a night of drinking alcohol might end in sex. Okay, so I’d said never again, but Minnesota coming home had thrown me for a loop. I wanted to prove to myself that I wasn’t still attracted to him, and you know what people said about getting over someone.

“Sorry Nancy, I have to go home.”

I blinked rapidly. First an apology and then he used my proper name without any hint of an insult. And he was turning down my awesome sex skills, because he knew as well as I did that was what was on the cards. I could see it in his eyes.

“Okay, no worries.” I smiled at him and then noticed that as well as ideas of sex in those eyes of his there was some sadness. “You okay?”

“Yeah, sure.” He frowned and started to walk away.

As I watched him leave something cracked in my chest. I’d never seen him take such slow steps or his shoulders so sloped. It wasn’t Shaw at all. As he reached the wings, he paused, and I took a step closer. I was going to give him a hug. He looked like he needed it. Then he turned around and tilted his head on one side.

“Hey, Nancy.”

“What?” I asked, a small smile on my face. Clearly my offer had been too good to resist.

“You should know that your ass looks kinda big in that skirt.”

He turned and left, and you know what, I couldn’t help but watch his ass and think that his was not big. At. All.

Nancy’s Bitch List for Shaw

Maximus Douchimus

Captain Shitsmear

Shit Talking Cock Womble

Dildohead

Dipshit Cockhead

Scrote Noggin

Assilicious

When I walked into the house, I was shocked by the sound of a toddler crying. I mean I knew that there was a child in the house, how could I forget? It was more that I didn’t think about the fact that they cried or needed feeding or diaper changes.

When Rett came over, Bronte and Carter, or Mom and Dad took care of him. Normally I’d make sure that I disappeared as soon as bodily fluids got involved. Now though, jeez, if Tiawasmy kid, then I’d have to learn pretty quick what to do. There was no question that I’d get my folks to do it, or that I’d give her up for adoption. Family was important in our… well, family. They’d never forgive me if I’d declined the honor of being her dad. In fact, I was pretty sure my mom would keep Tia and put me up for adoption.

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