Page 2 of The Love Dealer

He sighed and lifted his eyes toward the ceiling, unwillingly agreeing with a bob of his head. “Fine, Bre. Whatever you need.”

I heard the irritation in his voice, but I didn’t give a fuck. Tonight, I was going for mine, and I didn’t care how he felt about it.

* * *

Typically,I didn’t use my phone when I was engaging with someone one on one. With Nick, things were different. We didn’t really talk about anything outside of Trin or household things. Even on what was supposed to be a date, he was on his phone, and I’d finally pulled out mine.

The first thing I saw when I opened my Facebook messenger was a message from my ex, Alonso. I didn’t have to open it to know he was about to say something to make me laugh or smile. Alonso always had that effect on me. Honestly, he was the only male who had that effect on me.

Alonso Jackson: Sitcho fine ass down somewhere.

Bre Simmons: What I do now?

Alonso Jackson: That picture on your story. You’re beautiful as hell Bre.

Alonso Jackson: Every time you post a picture it feels like it’s just for me. I love looking at you.

Smiling, I squeezed my legs together. That was one thing I couldn’t deny—Alonso had always found me attractive. When we met sixteen years ago, Alonso would ask me to send him pictures of me daily. My confidence was a hell of a lot higher then than it was now. It was crazy how the right man could make a woman feel ten times better about herself than she already did, while words from the wrong man could make her feel worse about herself.

Now, don’t get me wrong, I’d never been the insecure type before Nick. But being with him changed me. From his exes to the women he followed and interacted with on social media; he didn’t seem to really have a type. He loved all things beautiful. And I could appreciate that, but sometimes, I would be like… damn…was this man even attracted to me?

Getting pregnant and gaining weight didn’t help the situation, and being a full-time, stay at home mom only made it worse. I gained a hell of a lot of weight, and thankfully, it evened out so that my body was stacked in all the right places. Plus, Nick ended up paying for me to get a mommy makeover that included a laser lipo procedure that flattened my stomach out.

I was all ass and titties, but I still struggled with my self-perception at times. Before Trin, I was a size six. Now, I was a sixteen.

Bre Simmons: I’m sure you say that to all your exes.

Alonso Jackson: Bullshit. I only say that shit to you. I love your face.

Nibbling my bottom lip, I stifled a blushed giggle. I couldn’t remember the last time Nick showered me in compliments or even told me I was beautiful. Though I knew I was, it was nice hearing it from a man.

Bre Simmons: What do you love most about my face?

Alonso Jackson: Your lips.

Bre Simmons: You miss kissing me?

Alonso Jackson: It’s been so long… I think I need a kiss to remember ??

“What nigga got you smiling over there like that?” Nick asked, drawing my attention back to him.

“Why do you think it’s a man?”

“Because you used to look like that when I flirted with you.”

My eyes rolled playfully as I closed the app without replying to Alonso’s message. If I told Nick I was talking to him, he would have a fit. We weren’t technically in a relationship, but Nick hated that I still conversed with Alonso, though we hadn’t been in the same space as each other for years. He swore there was still something between us. It didn’t matter how much I told him that wasn’t the case, Nick didn’t want to hear it.

“Doesn’t matter who I’m talking to. I’m here with you.”

“Tell me anything,” Nick replied with a half-smile.

I chuckled and lifted my lemonade for a sip. As he said he would, Nick took Trin to his brother’s house that morning before he went to work. I spent the morning sleeping in later than I had since giving birth before fixing breakfast and getting ready to start my day. Like he suggested, I spent the afternoon at the spa, being catered to. After my mani-pedi, facial, and massage, I grabbed lunch, then headed back home for another long ass nap. I stayed asleep until Nick arrived, then listened to music and lit a few candles while getting ready for our night together.

Outside of dinner and drinks, I didn’t know what else Nick had planned, but I was up for it. Even though we weren’t really talking much, it was good to be out of the house and in his presence.

“I know you not over there getting jealous,” I teased.

“Man, say.” Nick sucked his teeth and dismissively waved his hand before giving me another of his signature half smiles. “You know you mine. I don’t really give a fuckwhoyou talking to.”