Page 2 of The Hot Mess

Maybe that was what I needed in my life, I thought. More flexibility. I needed to learn how to go with the flow.

I got so lost in my own thoughts that I hadn’t realized the discussion was well under way, and my glass was nearly empty. I had been taking mindless sips as I drifted off in my head.

That’s when everything changed. I decided to do a thing I never did.

“Sorry to interrupt,” I announced. “But could someone make me another one of these?”

Conversation came to a dead halt as everyone turned their heads, eying the empty glass I held up in the air.

“Of course!” Magda marveled, jumping to.

“You know if Jada is having two cocktails, it’s arealparty.”

The worst part about poking your head out of your shell was everyone commenting on it, immediately making you feel less cool all over again.

But by my third cosmo, I could see why the ladies liked them so much…or any other cocktail they guzzled down. A warm fuzzy feeling settled in over my body, and I started to feel so much less…restricted.

The feeling puzzled me all through the night, following me home after our club meeting was over. I got to thinking…Why should you need to drink three cocktails to feel that way? To loosen up your inhibitions? Magda didn’t seem to need to drink to speak her mind. Lots of people seemed to have mastered the art of crawling out of their shells without needing alcohol as lubricant.

But lots of people lived with an ease that had eluded me, I remembered as I crawled into bed. Like the very thing I had spent half the day reading about, and the other half of the day thinking about. I turned on my pillow and reached for the vibrator in my drawer, but stopped myself.

Was it pathetic to be a twenty-five-year-old virgin who had grown bored with her vibrator? Her only tool for sexual release? Well, I supposed it wasn’t the only tool. I had my fingers after all, but somehow that seemed even more sad.

I shoved the drawer shut again and stared up at the ceiling with the covers draped over my chest. I felt a hunger inside that I couldn’t quite put words to, much less find a way to fulfill. How could you satisfy a need if you didn’t exactly know what the need was?

I rolled over in a huff, and it hit me like a ton of bricks. I knew exactly what I needed, but it wasn’t just one thing. I didn’t need to read anymore romance novels or retire to another night with my battery-operated boyfriend.

No. I needed a real-life romance with a boyfriend who was all flesh and blood. I needed my siblings to actually notice me at work. I needed not to be the one who brought the whole room to a halt if I dared to have more than one cocktail or if I was, god forbid, five minutes late.

I, Jada Meadows, was in desperate need of a change. Or maybe a few hundred changes.

1

Jack

The thick smog of the city was nothing like the tropical air I had grown used to over the past few weeks. The gas smell from the plane certainly wasn’t helping any. It made me wonder why I bothered coming back at all as I stepped down the stairs on the airstrip.

A driver in a black Buick was waiting for me as the other guys hopped to, transporting my luggage to the trunk. I loved to travel more than anything, but coming home was a different story. It always weighed heavy on my heart, making me restless all over again.

I had barely made it into the backseat when my phone started ringing. I expected it to blow up with messages now that I was back on the ground, but I didn’t expect to see a call so soon. Especially not from Lucas Meadows.

“Lucas, my man,” I answered. “You certainly don’t waste any time.”

“You said you were getting in last night,” he defended.

“Ah, that’s right. Got caught up on a last-minute scuba diving thing and decided to stay an extra morning. My bad.”

“Do you ever get any actual work done on these trips?” He laughed. “Or is it all just an excuse to play in the sun?”

“You know I like combining work and pleasure,” I replied. “What can I do for you?”

“I was hoping you could swing by to meet with me.”

“What…like, now?”

“If it’s not too much to ask. I have something I’m kind of eager to discuss with you.”

The last time I had been integral to matters at Heartstring, Lucas’s whole reputation and company was under fire thanks to his notorious playboy reputation. Each of the Meadows siblings had been criticized for the same thing. No one trusts a group of single people to sell them true love. But with three of them spoken for now, the scandal had died down.

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