Page 60 of Fighting For The Pack

“I think so, too.” I sat in the middle of the clearing and crossed my legs. “My mom used to take me to this spot when I was a kid. She would tell me that this was her ‘thinking spot’ when she was a younger wolf. She said that she’d lay out in the grass and stare up at the sky through the canopy until life started to make sense again.” I patted the spot next to me. “Wanna try it? I promise the grass is super soft.”

She hesitated, but eventually nodded. “Okay.” She sat down and together we lay back in the grass. The soft blades cradled us as we looked up toward the sky. It had started to lighten from black to a royal blue, a gradient that steadily lightened as it reached the horizon.

Lying like this took me back to those moments with Mom, when we would eat sweet homemade granola and she would tell me stories about shifters she knew.

“Is this okay?” I asked. “If it’s too quiet or something, we can keep walking.”

“No, no. I…I like this a lot actually.”

I couldn’t see her face, but something about her tone seemed a bit more relaxed. My chest warmed. I was doing something right!

“To be honest,” she said gently, “I’m surprised you’d want to talk to me after the way I acted when we went to talk to Tyrell.”

“Hm? But I thought we agreed that went okay all things considered.”

“Well, I thought so, too, but you never came by again after that. You never asked me to help you with any other Alpha projects around the compound.”

I started to respond, and then I stopped. I replayed that sentence in my head, and realized—she thought I was avoiding her?

I sat up on my elbow and looked down at her. “Wait, Tavi, I think you’ve been misunderstanding me. I was trying to give you space. I felt like I used Violet to make you help me out that day, and I didn’t want to push you into doing something you didn’t want to do again.”

She frowned, glancing away from me. “But it makes sense, doesn’t it? I was useless when we were held captive, and I only made things worse between you and the Kings.”

“That’s not true! Neither of us could do anything against Troy, and we were both hurt and scared and weak…and Tavi, I was so glad that I took you with me that day. I mean it.”

She didn’t say anything, but when she wouldn’t look at me, I knew that she wasn’t convinced. So I tried again.

“I would have loved to have you around with me these past couple of days. I’ve felt out of my depth and confused so many times, it would have been great to have you there with me…”

Guilt panged through my chest as my sentence trailed off. I’d spent so long thinking about how I was going to get Tavi to stand by my side, but none of that mattered if I’d messed this up before I even knocked on her door. How could I ask her to be my beta when I was so blind to what she wanted? I wasn’t there for her when she needed me because I was off doing my own thing, and I didn’t even consider that she might have wanted me to visit her.

“Tavi,” I said, “I should have done a better job at reaching out to you. I hate that I’ve made you feel like I didn’t value you. I feel terrible about this.”

She was quiet for a few seconds, and then she said quietly, “Well…it’s not like I did a great job saying what I wanted.” She started to tug at and tear up the grass between us. “I guess I shouldn’t have expected you to know that I wanted to see you or that I missed you. You couldn’t have known.”

The guilt began to ease from my chest. That response made me feel better about asking her to be my beta.

“We can both be sorry about our miscommunication,” I said, “or we can promise to do a better job of it in the future.” Communication was going to be key to what I wanted to ask her. “How about I stop by more often and you can let me know if it’s a good time for you?”

“I’d like that,” she nodded. “But I…I could make more of an effort to see you, too.”

“I don’t want you to push yourself too much, Tavi. Was the reason you didn’t want to walk through the compound because you didn’t want to see Tyrell or the other men?”

“That was…one of the reasons. I’m okay with walking around with other people, but I hate doing it by myself.”

“I don’t blame you—I feel that way, too. What was the other reason?”

She went quiet, and this time, I got the sense that she really didn’t want to talk about her reasoning any further. I wouldn’t push her about it.

“Well, whatever your reasons, I’m glad you’re willing to spend time with me a bit more,” I said. “That makes me really, really happy.”

“I’m glad you still want to spend time with me, too.” It almost sounded like there was a smile in her voice, but I didn’t look to confirm. “So, um, what did you want to talk about?” she asked.

“I…wanted to let you know before I announce it later tonight,” I said. “I want you to be my beta.”

She gasped and sat up. She looked down at me, grass still clinging to her hair. “Me?”

“Yes, you.” I grinned. It was obvious how badly she wanted it. “You’re my best friend, Tavi, so of course you’re the only person I could even consider for the job.”

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