Page 8 of The Taste of Charity
He glances down at my hand on his hand and I jerk it back quickly, feeling tingles rippling along my skin from where we touched.
“That actually wasn’t the worst of it.”
My mouth drops open. “It wasn’t? What the hell could she have done that was worse than cheating on you?”
“She cleaned out a bunch of money in our joint account and then ran off with the fucker she was screwing around with.”
“Wow,” I breathe. “That is worse. I’m so sorry, Jameson. She obviously didn’t deserve a great guy like you.”
He huffs out a sharp breath and then glances away, clearing his throat. “So I just focused on my shop. Did my best to keep it running and make it as big and successful as I could, mostly to give her a big ‘fuck you’.”
I giggle again, clapping a hand over my mouth, my eyes dancing. “I’m sure she regretted it sooner rather than later. Some people just don’t know a good thing when they have it.”
“What about you? Do you know a good thing when you have it?”
I freeze, my feet stuck to the road, unable to take another step. “Yeah,” I whisper. “I do. But sometimes recognizing it doesn’t mean that you can keep it.”
He moves closer and his hand caresses my arm softly. My eyes follow the movement, hypnotized by the fire that’s struggling to flame up under my skin. Slowly and surely it feels like Jameson is rebuilding something I thought was lost completely. Starting with my trust.
I look up into his steady blue gaze and stand straighter. “I was married.”
His eyebrows lift but he doesn’t stop touching me, stroking my arm while I feel goosebumps dance on my skin everywhere he touches. “What happened, Charity?”
The sound of my name on his firm lips makes me shiver. I want to hear him whisper it again and again.
But I need to tell him the truth. The reason that the thought of ever loving someone again terrifies the hell out of me. The reason I’m not even sure I deserve it. Heaven’s for angels and I fell from grace a long time ago.
“I had a migraine.” My mind drifts back to that night. Ice slivers in my veins chilling me to the bone. I can see Alec smiling at me as he gently pushes my hair out of my face, kissing my cheek.
“Don’t worry, baby. I’ll take the kids to my parents and we’ll let you get some rest. You just take some medicine and use that ice pack I bought you. I’m sure it will get you fixed up in no time.”
Tears sting my eyes when I see him pick up little Angie and Dennison. “Come on, kiddos. Mommy needs a little alone time because she isn’t feeling well. We’ll go pay Grandma and Grandpa a quick visit. I bet they’ve even got some cookies just for you guys.”
Both kids erupt in smiles and my chest tightens painfully. It’s the last time I see their little grins. Angie’s dark eyes sparkling while she sucks her thumb and gurgles. Dennison, older and quieter still grins happily, patting Alec on the cheek. “Let’s go, Daddy!”
Alec turns and smiles in the doorway, blowing me a kiss while he carries the kids down to the car and straps them in. I wish to god I’d told him he didn’t need to do it. Told him that I’d rather they stay home. I didn’t need peace and quiet.
All I needed was my family.
Sobs tear through me and before I know what’s happening I’m wrapped in warm, strong arms and my head is propped up on a strong chest that smells like spice and man, my tears soaking his t-shirt.
“Shhh. It’s alright, Charity. You don’t need to finish the story. I can guess…”
I pull back and scrub at my face. “No. You should know the kind of person I am.”
He nods slowly and lets me pace back and forth in front of him. Just lets me ramble the story out in my own way, in my own time.
“Alec left with the kids and he called me later to tell me that they made it to his parents. He was thinking about staying the night because they were all tired. But I missed them. I missed having them there and since I felt better, I just wanted them to come home. It was selfish and stupid and I should have just let them stay there. Stay safe.” I stumble on a rock and catch myself before I hit the ground. My head sinks to my chest. “If only I’d told him to just stay. That car would never have hit them,” I whisper, tears clogging my throat so badly that I can barely breathe through it.
I straighten my shoulders. “They were on their way home and a drunk driver coming home from the bar went left of center and crashed head-on into the car. Alec and Dennison were killed instantly. Angie hung on for two days and I sat there and held her little hand, praying that she’d be alright. That god wouldn’t take the last damn thing that I had left in this world. But she passed away without waking up two days later. I had to make funeral arrangements and deal with the cops while I was barely functioning. And you know what the worst part of the whole damn thing was besides the fact that if I hadn’t been so fucking selfish they wouldn’t have been out there?”
He shakes his head, murmuring softly under his breath.
“The guy that did it barely got a fucking scratch. He took my whole life away from me and he had a tiny little scratch on his face. That was it. They said that it was probably because he was so fucking drunk that he didn’t tense up.”
Jameson’s mouth twists and he draws me into his arms again. I sigh and lean into him. “Uptown, that was not your fault. Fate moves in mysterious ways. Sometimes no matter what you do you can’t stop what’s gonna happen. No matter how much you wish you could. No matter how many things you promise to change.”
“It’s all my fault,” I whimper and turn my face into his chest, crying until I barely notice when he picks me up and carries me over to a bench alongside the road. He cradles me gently, rocking me to and fro, not seeming to care that we’re sitting out where anyone can see us.
