Page 80 of Hold

“Jesus, Gabe.” She needed to put Benji to bed, but she pushed him out of the door instead, following him onto the porch and far away from the open window to the living room.

“Who are all your friends?” he said at once.

“My study group. Listen, Gabe—”

“Study group? You’re at school?”

“Yes.” She tried to raise her chin, to remember the pride that she’d gotten this far, no thanks to him.

“Ah, pet. What a mess.” He put a hand around hers, but she pulled away. “You don’t have to work anymore, don’t you see? I’ll take care of everything.”

“You’ll pay me back the years of child support you owe me?”

“Well, I—”

“You’ll pay half the price of this house? The food? School supplies for the boys?” She was forgetting to keep her voice down.

“I’ll take care of you. That’s what I’m saying.” He talked as though saying the words made it so. “You don’t need to wear yourself out with school. What can they teach you there, anyway?”

“How to support myself because you never did!” she hissed.

“Bunch of abstract crap that doesn’t help you figure out how to change a lightbulb or do your taxes.”

She’d heard his tirade against higher education before. She’d been in such a dark place when she was with him, she’d believed him. Anyway, it had all seemed too much to reach for when she was chasing around after the boys every day.

She rubbed a hand over her face and turned away. “Whatever. I’ll see you tomorrow at the church.”

But Gabe wasn’t done. He grabbed her wrist again, harder this time. “Just remember,” he said into the darkening sky. The shadow on the porch meant that she couldn’t see his eyes, just hear that poisonous voice as he pulled her closer to him. “You belong with me. Your ginger friend is outta here. And who else would have you?”

He walked down the porch steps with a spring in his step. Thea stayed frozen for a second, breathing in the poison she’d thought she was free of.

They all left her with troubled faces that night. Her friends. In the fall, they’d be beginning classes in their own specialties and starting practicums in the winter. They would have to work hard to see each other again. And Thea couldn’t think past the next day. She was so used to being alone, she assumed that she would be again.

Chapter 23

She had to talk to Liam again the next morning when he came to pick up Jake. She could have texted him, but it seemed ridiculous when he was right on the street. He didn’t come to the door, but stayed in his truck. The blue monster baby’s low roar was alarm enough for anyone.

Thea picked her way down the path, which was strewn, as usual, with the cracked concrete and weeds she’d become accustomed to. Somehow, today they merely highlighted all that was pointless about her, all that Liam was going to be able to walk away from so easily.

He wasn’t expecting her, of course, and it was a few seconds before he reached over to lower the passenger window.

“I just wanted to tell you. You don’t have to pick up Benji today.”

His lips tightened. His eyes, which had been on her while he opened the window, slid away. “All right.”

“Okay.” She didn’t have to explain why, but she did anyway. “Gabe’s picking him up.”

“Fine.”

“It’s good, Liam. If he wants to rebuild his—”

“Yep. I said it’s fine.”

And thank the moon and stars, Jake was behind her, waiting for her to get out of the way so he could climb in the truck. Jake said, “Bye, Mom,” but Liam didn’t say another word and peeled out, not trying to keep the blue monster baby’s roar down.

♦

Liam and Jake were widening a channel for a sewer pipe at the house they’d visited on Jake’s first day. Pat had come earlier with the backhoe and dug the main trench. He’d let Jake take a turn.

---