Page 47 of Shattered Union

I pace my living room floor. Where the hell is Ava?

I glance down at the white stick that's on the table. The stupid blue lines are present. Telling me something I had already guessed. But it still shook me to the core. Seeing the positive result had me falling to my arse and sobbing into my arms.

This wasn't how I ever envisioned getting pregnant. I had always thought I'd be happy, in love, and ready to be pregnant. But now? Things are so up in the air. I'm at a stage right now where I'm not sure what I want to do with my life or where I want to be.

Fuck. Why is this happening? I can't deal with this. I really can't.

My front door opens and I turn. Relief washes through me when my best friend walks in. She'll help me, she'll guide me.

"What's wrong?" she asks as soon as she sees my face.

I sink down onto the sofa. My hands and legs shaking.

"Jesus, Callie. What's going o—" She cuts off, her gaze going to the table. "Oh," she breathes. "Is this?" she questions.

I nod. "Yes," I whisper, my voice wobbly. I turn to face my best friend. "What do I do?" I ask her. I need to know the answer. I need for her to help me.

She reaches for my hand as she sits down beside me. "It's going to be okay," she says, also whispering. "I promise, it's going to be okay."

Tears slowly roll down my face. "I was going to leave," I tell her. "I had found a house I liked. I planned on leaving," I confess. I haven't told anyone else. I wasn't even meant to tell her. Not until I had everything set in stone.

Her eyes narrow. "What?" she hisses. "Go where?"

"I can't be here anymore," I tell her truthfully. "I can't sleep, I can't eat. I can't function. I miss him, Ava. So damn much. But it's over. I need to move on."

She sucks in a sharp breath. Her eyes filling with tears. "Oh, Callie. Why didn't you tell me?"

I swipe away at the tears. "That I'm weak? I can't get over him. It's too damn hard seeing him every day. I love him and I love Chloe, but it hurts. It kills me not to have him." The tears fall thicker and faster. "I can't do it anymore."

She nods. "Okay, so where are we going?"

I fall into my best friend. Her arms tighten around me. I don't deserve her. I really don't, but I'm so lucky to have her.

For the first time today, I laugh. I lean back at her and see her face. "London."

She crinkles her nose. "Eh, if we have too." She glances back at the table. "So you're pregnant."

I take a deep breath and sit back against the sofa. "Looks like it." I bite the inside of my cheek. "What am I going to do?"

She grips my hand once again. "What do you want?"

I shrug. "I have no idea right now. I haven't been making the right choices lately."

"Callie, you fell in love with a man. He lied to you. That's not your fault. It's on him."

I bring my legs up onto the sofa and wrap my arms around them, resting my cheek on my thigh.

"Do you want to keep it?"

I nod. "I want this baby. But, I feel guilty, I feel so guilty."

She closes her eyes, a tear tumbles down onto her cheek. "Because you're having a baby with a married man."

She gets it.

"He's still with her. I don't want to break up a marriage." It's bad enough I slept with him while they were married. Even worse, I did it after I found out.

"At least you had the amazing goodbye sex," she says with a smirk.

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