Page 55 of Meant to Be

He nods, fidgeting around in his pocket, pulling out a scrap bit of paper and handing it over to me.

“You sure we can’t meet somewhere else?”

“Nope, these are my terms, Jax.”

Looking up into his sad eyes was probably the worst mistake I could have made. Just being here with him now makes me feel weak. I put the piece of paper in my back pocket for safe keeping.

“Thanks.”

“You look beautiful by the way.”

“I... I have to go, they’ll be waiting for me.” I don’t need compliments right now, I’m not sure what I really need. I walk away, but I stop, turning back around.

“Sorry about your mum.”

He doesn’t answer me, just looks to the floor. I’m having to stop myself from running back to him and hugging him. I need to be an adult here. I see Addison and Harry by the doors waiting for me. I try to be normal as I reach them, but Addison knows me, she puts her arm around me.

“What did he say?”

“I don’t want to talk about it, I just want to go home.”

“Alright,” she hands me my carrier from Asda, they got the items I left in the trolley, and we part ways. I go one way, and they go another. My dad's house is only ten minutes from here. It’s weird how my dad lives so close to me, but I never realised.

When I get into the house, I go straight to my room; exhausted and flop down on the bed. My eyes shut as soon as my body feels the softness of my bed.

I’ll deal with the events of today as soon as I’ve had a little nap.

Chapter Eighteen

Jaxon

My trolley had disappeared when I got back inside the supermarket, so I grab another starting at the beginning, all over again. Grabbing myself new bed sheets, a duvet and pillows then food essentials. Once I’ve got everything, I end up with four bags of shopping. Walking back to the hostel, I dump the shopping on the counter and strip off those dirty, manky sheets. They’re almost brown.

I remake the bed then put away my food.

Lying back on my clean bed, I clasp my hands behind my head and look up at the ceiling. All I can think about is Shelby. How good she looked, how happy and healthy she looked too. God, I’ve missed her. Seeing that bump was the biggest shock of my life. I need to speak to her, I just want to explain to her, I need to make things right with us.

I don’t know, though, if she’ll ever give me another chance.

The first time waking up in a different bed will never get any better, especially when it’s only temporary accommodation. It takes me a minute or so to remember where I am before the recollection kicks in.

I want to settle down somewhere, but God knows when that will ever be. I have a few days grace before going to my parole officer so I can relax over the weekend. He’s sorting me a job too, it’ll be good to do something. Since being in prison and having a daily routine, I know I’m going to get bored quickly.

Pouring myself some cereal and making a cup of tea, I sit down to eat before realising I have no clothes. Great. Most of my allowance money I left prison with has gone on stuff for this place.

Looking inside the carrier bag I left prison with, I see some papers and my phone, which is obviously dead with no charger, along with some loose change and my wallet. There’s forty pounds in there too.

Happy days. This day is going to get better, I can just tell.

Finishing my breakfast, I have a quick wash then head back to Asda to buy a charger lead and some basics. Underwear is a must and a couple of changes of clothes until I can get a job and buy some new stuff.

On my way back to the building, a girl with long dark hair is pressing the buzzer. Seeing her bump, I smile, I know who that is right away.

“Shelby?” Her head twists in my direction, I smile, but she doesn’t. “Hang on, I have a key.”

Standing behind her I reach an arm around her to put my key in the door. It opens, and I let her step in first. She hangs back, and I take the lead up the stairs.

“Please excuse the room, this wouldn’t be my choice…”