Page 29 of Meant to Be

“I was asleep by nine-thirty.”

“That’s thirteen hours sleep, babe. Are you feeling okay?

“No. I’ve been ill again this morning.”

“Ill?”

“Yes, sick again.”

“Maybe you should go to the doctor…?”

“Yeah maybe. Okay, I’m nearly at school I have to go.”

“Okay, I’ll pick you up.”

“Alright. Thanks”

"Love ya babe.”

She cuts off the phone, and I drop it down on the bed as a message comes through.

Sorry to cut you off. Love you too. xxx

Mum’s in her usual drunken state, giving out her orders and having a go at me. I’m refusing to go and buy anymore vodka for her, she can make do with what she’s got.

“Jaxson Cartwright, you’re a useless piece of shit just like your father was,” she slurs.

“Why, because I’ve cut off your vodka? You’re the useless one.”

Jesus, I need out of this house, and I need a job.

Picking up the post from the floor, I open all the letters in brown envelopes first, they look more important.

As I pull out the letter, all the writing is in red with the heading, ‘overdue payments’. I scan over it quickly. I leave it on the side and open another - that reads the same, and the next. If she doesn’t ring them and find a way of paying the bills - the water, electricity and gas will be cut off. Well, that’s just fantastic.

“Mum,” I shout angrily and pick up the letters. Running up the stairs, I throw them down on the bed. “Get your lazy, drunken arse out of bed, you need to sort these out.”

This is just another problem to add to the stack of ones I already have.

“Why can’t you be a proper mum, why do you have to be like this?” She doesn’t answer, she has the sheet over her head refusing to listen to me like a child would. Shaking my head, I run back down the stairs and hide all the alcohol. I’ve had enough of this shit.

I grab her car keys and leave the house, hastily pulling away to start looking for work.

It’s Benefits Day today. Heading to the bank, I take out some money and find the nearest florist. I buy a nice bunch of flowers and place them on the back seat before heading off to the school. I still have to pinch myself that Shelby would even want to be with me. I know she’ll probably think I’m a bit of a sap, but I know she isn’t well, this might cheer her up a little bit.

Pulling up at the school, I sit at the kerb and wait until it’s time for them to come out. I recline my seat and lay back thinking over my day… Everywhere I’ve gone to for work today has come up with a dead end. There’s no work around here and the only jobs there are, I’m not qualified for - even though I’m willing to learn. It’s bullshit that no-one will give a kid a chance these days just to prove themselves. How are you meant to get the experience they want if they don’t look twice at you?

The first few start trickling through the gate, but I don’t see Shelby yet. Getting out of the car, I lean against it and wait patiently. A familiar voice cuts through the racket, and I see Harry approaching.

“Hey, dude.”

“What’s going on?” I ask with a chin lift to my cousin.

We clasp hands in a handshake when he reaches me.

“Nothing mate, just waiting for Shelby.”

“Oh, she’s talking to a teacher, I’ve just walked past her.” Harry answers.

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