Page 50 of Meant to Be

Dear Jax,

How are you? I hope you’re surviving in there?

I miss you so much, and I have so much to tell you, I don’t know where to start.

I’m not sure if Harry gave you my new address or not, but you have it now in case you’d like to write.

I’ve left home, obviously, with the new address and all. Anyway, I’m living with my dad, I know, shock right?

He explained a few things about why he left me and guess what, it was all my mum’s fault.

It feels weird speaking to you like this, but this is how it’s got to be I suppose.

Okay, so here goes... My dad has promised to support me, he knows all about you now. He’s been really understanding. I’m really happy here. My mum knows I’m with Dad, and she’s not pleased, but I’m sixteen, and in the eyes of the court I can make the decision about which parent I want to live with.

I really don’t want to tell you this in a letter, but I suppose I’ll have to. I’m an emotional mess at the moment, so it’s a good job I don’t have to say all this out loud.

The day you saw me at the clinic – I didn’t go through with it. I was too upset, and the nurse wouldn’t do it. She was on my side, she knew it wasn’t me who wanted this and again being sixteen I had a say in what I wanted. If only we’d known all this a few days before… My mum made me another appointment, but I ran away from home, literally.

As I said I’m living with my dad now, he’s looking after me.

I see Harry and Addy at school still, it’s not that far really, my dad takes me in and his wife, Anna, picks me up.

The school knows about my condition and have said I can do a lot of my revision from home, but they want me to go in until full revision actually starts which is another few weeks.

I hope this doesn’t come as too much of a shock to you and I hope it makes you happy. I’m not expecting anything when you’re out, it’s up to you. I needed to get all this off my chest, closure I guess. I wouldn’t blame you if you hated me.

I don’t think there’s much more to say other than I love you and probably always will.

Stay safe in there, if not for me then for your child. I don’t want our baby growing up without a dad like I have done for the last eight years.

Well, I suppose it's time to go. I have homework to do.

Speak soon.

With all my love, Shelby ♥? xxxx

I fold up the letter, putting it inside the envelope and sealing it. I wipe away the tears that have fallen as I’ve written it and bring up the address that Harry sent me. Writing it on the back, I put on a stamp and put it in my bag.

Pulling my homework from my bag, I set it out in front of me, but I can’t concentrate. I push it away, pulling up my knees to my chest and rest my cheeks on them, instead of holding it in - I let it all out. All the emotions of writing the letter, how much I miss him. I miss his hugs, his compliments and worst of all I miss how much he loved me. The ragged sobs tear through me, racking my body as I shake. I feel an arm go around me.

“Let it all out Shelb? It won’t make you feel better, but it’ll cleanse your soul.”

I turn my face into her and cry, doing precisely what Anna says.

She was right though, it did help. Now to wait for a reply.

Chapter Sixteen

Jaxon

Three Months Later

I hate this place.

It’s dark and dirty.

It’s better than the other place though, I’ll admit. They moved me here after three weeks in the other place. I can come and go from my cell as I please, as it’s a Category D prison. We can go outside, we have a gym and a tv room. It’s like a holiday camp in all honesty. We also have a work detail so I can earn some money while I’m here. That doesn’t mean I’ll be coming back here anytime soon.

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