Page 71 of All Yours

“Well, yeah. And I take care of her.”

“Jonah, you’re gonna have to do more than play house before she knows.”

“But why does she assume I’m pretending when we’re alone?”

“The penis.”

“That’s sexist.” I snap.

She laughed and shook her head. “Look, it’s obvious she thinks that she coerced you into a fake relationship and feels guilty. You need to tell her you loved her long before this mess happened. But you were too big a chicken to do anything about it.”

“That’s not fair,” I protest, even though she hit the nail on the head. “What makes you think I’ve loved her for a long time?”

“I’ve seen it,” Lauren laughed. “The whole town has seen it. Everyone but Sloane, of course.”

“Great,” I quipped. “And you never pointed it out to her?”

“Not my place. For the longest time, she wasn’t ready.”

“Then, why are you fussin’ at me for not telling her?”

“Because you were the one pretending to be in a fake relationship with her while actually being in love and sleeping with her. That seems like something that should fall into your jurisdiction. Besides, you’re the most straightforward person I’ve met. I can’t believe you weren’t honest with her. That’s so unlike you.”

“We’ve already established that I’m a chicken.” The cold from the ground now radiating through my entire body. My toes were numb.

“Not usually,” she said. “So why with Sloane?”

“Because,” I said, pushing myself to sitting. The cold now caused my teeth to chatter. “Sloane made it painfully clear that this was only a pretend relationship. She drove the point into the ground every chance she got.”

“Wait, so you think she knew it was real for you and still just used you for the fake relationship? That’s awful. Do you think she’d do that?”

“No—”

“Dude, she got so drunk on Halloween trying to work up the courage to make a move on you.”

The news bashed through my consciousness. “I’m sorry. She needed to drink to work up the courage to make a move on me? Are you kidding me? All she had to do was this.” I crooked my finger in the signal to come here. My hands prickled with numbness. I pushed myself off the ground.

Lauren laughed.

I reached down and pulled her to standing.

“Well, go find her and tell her ‘I’m all yours’,” Lauren said with a smile.

“That’s the corniest damn thing I’ve ever heard.”

“It’ll work.”

“She kicked me out at the police station. Told me to get out of her house. It seemed… final.”

“I’m sure she was just stressed out. I can’t imagine. Handcuffed, then her dad shows up. She hasn’t seen him in like five years. Dude’s a piece of work.”

“Oh, that he is,” I said.

“She stood up to him?”

“Yep,” I said, smiling at the memory.

“Good. Now just tell her the truth, and everything will be fine.”

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