Page 32 of Dancing with a Ghost

"That's not what I meant. I just wished we knew how to make this curse, or whatever it is, go away. Right now, we're stumbling along in this relationship, and not getting any closer to a conclusion. I just don't want you to get bored."

"You think I'm bored? Jesus, Matty. I'm far from it and I'm as frustrated as you are. I don't know what to do but I'll take what I can get for as long as it takes."

He hesitated then and when he finally spoke; it was the barest of whispers.

"I'll take what I can for as long as we have, even if it's only a few months more."

I pulled him closer to me, kissing the top of his head.

"We will fix this, I know we will. We have to, Toby. I've waited too long to find you. I won't let you go that easily. I just don't know what to do."

We were silent for a long time, he was no doubt thinking about our predicament the same as I was. I thought I'd recalled all I could but there must have been a missing piece, like an errant puzzle piece hiding.

Think, Matty, think.

Sister Mary had said that to free myself from this limbo, I needed to find my kindred soul. This was nothing new, why couldn't I think of anything else?

God, I was so cross. So, so…..fucking annoyed I could shout!

"Hey, what's going on? I'm getting anger from you and a lot of it."

The ability to read each other's emotions and feelings had been steadily growing. I could tell you at any time of day what he was feeling. Whether his mother had annoyed him or if he was happy, usually first thing in the morning before he had to start his day. A time where we lay together as lovers, before the vagaries of the day intruded.

It just wasn't enough.

"I need to pee and I need coffee," he said, throwing the covers back and getting out of bed. I watched as he walked to his bathroom, his lithe figure tempting me. I loved how he walked. That dancer's strut he had, and I loved how he had no shame walking around the room completely naked. He drew me in like no man before him and even sleep rumpled, he was gorgeous. His dark hair was messy and just a little long now.

I loved being naked with him. Loving that he didn't care about my burns, worshipping my body when he could. We'd tried all things now, except for that one thing that could cement our relationship. I hated to think that my becoming human might be reliant on the performing of such a sexual act. I still found it hard to talk about that one step that neither of us was willing to name.

Surely it couldn't be that.

"I can hear you thinking in there." He shouted from the bathroom. "Stop trying too hard. It'll come, and when it does, it'll be the most wonderful and magical thing ever."

He strolled back in after washing his hands, his cock hanging loosely between his legs.

"Let's just relax today. I've no work to do and we can connect the laptop to the TV, watch the movies we both love, and chill. We've time, Matty."

He was right to a certain extent. We had ten months until my time ran out, plenty of time. Except, I didn't think I had that long. I hadn't wanted to tell Toby, had been trying to shield my feelings on this, but I could feel my body starting to fade at times. As much as his attention and the attachment we had to each other had made me feel more whole than ever, the effects were starting to wane. I was resting more in the day, more than I'd done when we'd first met.

He thought we had time. I just hoped he was right.

We cuddled on the sofa for the rest of the day. Toby singing at the top of his voice. At times, getting up to dance too. I tried to laugh with him. I was no singer and had two left feet but his enthusiasm for musicals was contagious.

The movie came to an end and Toby went to his laptop, ready to start another.

"Would you mind if I left for a while? Not long, but I think I just need to recharge the old batteries."

He looked at me, a puzzled expression on his face. "I didn't think you needed to do that anymore."

"Oh, I don't usually, but I didn't rest well last night. Maybe somewhere quiet will help."

"Okay, if that's what you want," he said, reaching for his t-shirt and pulling it over his head.

I walked over to him, running my hands up his back. "Don't be like that, sweetheart. It doesn’t mean what you think it does."

"I know, I get it. You need to rest and I should go home, pick up some clean clothes at least, or wash the ones I have."

I knew that to be a lie, as he used the laundry service here at the hotel. My words had clearly upset him. I thought about backtracking, saying that it didn't matter, but I also knew that to be a lie. It did.

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