Page 31 of Dancing with a Ghost

That was it, the final comment.

"You know what, Mother? If I want to use a pad and paper, I will. I don't like the iPad, I wouldn't even use the phone if I didn't have to. Technology and I don't mix, never have done."

The look of horror on her face was worthy of a photograph.

"And stop treating me like a child, and yes, I'm aware of how that sounds. I'm your son after all, but you sit on my shoulder at every meeting we have, be it for a conference, a wedding or a children's fucking party. Just letmedo my thing for once."

"Well," she spluttered and flustered, not able to get her words out. I'd never seen her face so red and thinking back, I don't think I'd ever answered her back or stood up to her. I know dad didn't, content with pottering about in his gardens, letting her get on with the decision making. Sometimes, though, it went to her head.

The adage sprung to mind 'why have a dog and bark yourself' and this was exactly what she was doing. She had me to do the planning but insisted on being in every meeting, checking up on what I was doing. I was sick and tired of it. It needed to stop.

"Please stop interfering. Let me do the job you brought me here to do. A job I actually don't mind doing. I just wish you'd let me do it properly, on my own. I'm more than capable of deciding what needs to be done. I'm more than capable of meeting new clients. You don't have to be there every time."

"Is that what you think? That I'm interfering?"

"Yes, mother, I do, and it needs to stop. Now, I'm going to go check the emails sent to me, as the event planner, and I'm going to sort them. You need to concentrate on doing what you do best, which is running the hotel."

I picked up my coffee from the table and walked towards the door.

"If you need me, I'll be in my office." I leaned against the wall just outside the door, breathing heavily. This was why I didn’t do confrontation.

By the time I got to my office, I felt exhausted. I hated doing that, which was why I allowed her to treat me the way she did. I sat on my chair and lay my head on the desk. I was done for the day and it was only just past midday.

"I'm glad you finally stood up to her."

I looked up to see Matty standing on the other side of the desk, a big smile on his face.

"Maybe now you'll get the recognition you deserve."

“Only time will tell. How about we go back to bed?” I asked, standing up from my desk, suddenly having more energy than I knew what to do with. “Finish what we started earlier.”

“I think that’s a great idea.”

Chapter Fourteen

Matthias

Sincespendingthenightwith Toby, touching and tasting him, I found it hard to stay away. We were inseparable, and night after night, slept together in his room, kissing and caressing, but never more than that. I was fine with it, nervous about taking things any further and Toby didn't seem in any rush, either.

We were both getting frustrated, though. We were no closer to a breakthrough now than we were weeks ago, when we first started this.

What would it take for me to be human again? Would I ever be human again? Why didn't I have any more information?

During the day, I'd rack my brains, delving into the depths for anything I might have forgotten, each day coming up empty. I had to be missing something. I just didn't know what.

"Don't you miss your own bed?" I asked one morning as we lay in bed. It was a Saturday, or so Toby said, and he'd nothing planned. "It can't be much fun staying here all the time. I'm not that interesting."

"What the actual fuck, Matty? I don't want to be anywhere else. You are all that matters at the moment. I want you with me all the time, and if that means staying here every day and night, then that's what I'll do."

"Surely you have other things you need to do, though. When was the last time you went home, to your own flat?"

"Does it matter?" he asked, turning his head to look up at me.

I supposed it didn't, but I hated to be the reason that he was here and not there. I knew he must have other things to do. I wasn't arguing. If nothing happened and we couldn’t complete our bond, I'd treasure every moment we'd spent together, although the likelihood of me actually remembering anything was small. If we couldn't connect, then I'd be no more, and Toby? Well, he'd forget me in time and find someone else, as difficult as it was for me to think about that.

"I just wished I knew what we were doing." I knew I shouldn’t be taking my frustration out on him, it was no more his fault than it was mine.

"Well, I thought it was pretty obvious, didn't you?" He sat up then, moving from his usual position on my chest, sitting up, his arms crossed.

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