Page 97 of The Star's Sword

“And you can be trusted?” I asked. “With their position?” I already knew the answer.

“Yes,” Ara said. “Because I have already made the ultimate sacrifice. I have fought my whole life and I believe I am worthy. But I need you to get me there. Do the dirty work. I can’t get through the celestials. I can’t take out multiple ninth realm celestials. That is a specialized kind of weapon. One that is very needed right now.” She came forward to take my hands, standing and looking down at me. “Cleo, there could be no more rogues.”

“Then why does Sam have to die?” I yelled, standing and darting around her, needing to escape.

She grabbed my wrist, jerking me back to her. “Cleo, I can’t let you just run away from this.” She pulled me in, and I struggled weakly, my heart hurting more than my body. “I know you’re terrified.” She pulled me in and locked me in a firm hug. “I know you think everything can’t be fixed with the vampires and I know you’re afraid to lose Samael. But right now, if you run, you’ll lose everything anyway. How long before the ninth realm celestials come for Samael anyway? All of our time is borrowed.”

I nodded against her, slumping and just giving in to letting her hold me.

I hadn’t known I needed it so much.

“But one thing I know is the time you are meant to have with Sam, you are wasting, by not being the woman he needs you to be. By not being strong enough to accept the sacrifice he is ready to make, and love him in acceptance, rather than denial of that fact. Go be the woman he loves with him, for all the time he has left. And for god’s sake, try to make him strong enough to survive anything. Fight, Cleo. We still need to fight.”

I sucked in a breath, letting my ribcage expand for what felt like the first time since I’d heard Samael could die on my rise.

She was right. Nothing was certain. We could still change the future. The prophecy, who knew what would happen to ninth realm matter if it was mixed with demon, like in Samael?

A spark of hope lit in me, and I grabbed onto it with both hands, feeling my courage finally flicker back to life.

A life without Sam? I couldn’t think of it.

But a life where I wasn’t the woman Samael deserved, where I didn’t keep the promise I made to him, back in the cemetery all those days ago, to kill his father, that wasn’t a life I wanted either.

To disappoint Samael, to take away the justice he’d dreamed of for so long would be selfish.

Ara was right. I couldn’t live that way either.

I couldn’t give up my love or my rise as the Morningstar. So I realized I would just have to find a way to have both.

“I get it,” I said, steeling my heart and pulling away from Ara. “I won’t falter again. But I doubt the vampires will care regardless.”

“Simon convinced them to give you another chance,” she said.

I cocked my head. “What? But Cayne killed so many of them. They already hated me.”

Ara smiled slightly. “I believe he sold it as a way to kill you and for them to have vengeance, if you lost.” Her smile widened. “Which he knows you won’t.”

“But how? They won’t even acknowledge I donated, and they hate me, and Vasara doesn’t even fight, she just sends vampires at people.”

“Exactly,” Ara said. “Go show them that.”

I shook my head. “They won’t see.” I remembered that night, everyone defending her, flooding in to betray Simon.

Why would I want their help anymore anyway?

“I know there is a reason you’re supposed to work with the vampires,” she said. “We have one shot at this. Just try one more time. You never know if just one vampire swayed makes a huge difference.”

I hung my head. “So they just want to kill me. They want me to face punishment.”

“Right,” Ara said. “But you’re innocent. And she’s weak, Cleo. Just force a fight with her. She’s weak.”

“She runs,” I said. “She runs and leaves the others to fight for her.”

“Then fight them,” Ara said. “Fight them until they move out of the way. Then fight her, fight her until her mask falls. Fight her until the illusions run out. Fight her with the fury you feel at the time lost with Sam due to her stupidity. Fight her with the knowledge that she is surely allied with those who hurt demons in the dark. Fight her because there is no other way, Cleo.”

I grit my teeth. “I told you, she won’t fight me.” I shook my head. “A fight is all I was training for. She’s using all of the social approval to get out of a fight.”

“Simon set up trials for you,” Ara said. “Why not trust him? He understands vampires.”