Page 118 of Heartless
My mouth opens and closes, and I peek over at Cade for some sort of sign that I’m not out of line in saying something here. His gloved hands are slung over the top of his shovel, his tanned stubbled face glistening with a light sheen of sweat.
He’s fucking lickable.
Too good to leave behind, that’s for sure.
“No, pal. I don’t think I am. Not permanently, anyway. I think I’d miss you too much. Is that okay with you?”
His round face softens, hair flopping onto his forehead as he nods. “Yeah. I’d miss you too. And I think my dad would be really lonely without you.” With a sweet little smile, he turns and scampers through the front door, like he didn’t just leave Cade and me out here with watery eyes.
“Did you talk to him?”
Cade rubs a gloved hand over his eye. “No. Figured I should talk to you first.” He sniffs.
“You okay? Did I overstep?”
“Not at all.” He clears his throat. “Just got dust in my eye.” He rubs again.
“Cool, cool. Me too,” I say, giving him an exaggerated watery wink.
“How was brunch?” He digs again, arms flexing as he does.
I never knew a man digging out a spot for a sidewalk could be an aphrodisiac, but here I am, admiring the way his shoulders bulge against his T-shirt and the tendons in his forearms ripple in the sunlight.
“Good.”
“You actually going to stay?” he asks, without looking up at me. Instead, he tosses a shovel full of dirt behind himself and keeps working.
“You really going to keep working while we have this conversation?”
“Yup,” is his gruff response.
“Yesterday you were allMe Cade. You woman. Stay here. Eat pussy every day,” I say in what is a sad attempt at some sort of Tarzan impersonation.
He doesn’t laugh though. “Well, today I’m more worried you’ll be thinking straight and will realize you belong in the city doing whatever fancy shit you do.”
“Manage a bar while slinging beer? My glamorous lifestyle truly knows no bounds.”
“Listen”—he shoves the shovel into the ground like he wants to hurt it before finally looking up at me—“if all this out here isn’t enough for you, I’d rather you just go now. I wasn’t joking about what I said yesterday. And it feels like a lot. I...” He glances away, wiping the back of his arm over his forehead. “I don’t want to live my life scared anymore. But I also don’t want to be made a fool of again.”
That painful twisting sensation is back in my chest. The heavy rock in my gut. This man deserves so much better than what he’s received.
“Cade, look at me.”
His jaw clenches, but he doesn’t look my way, opting to stare down at the ground he’s dug out.
So that’s where I go. I sit down in the dirt right in front of him.
“The fuck you doing, woman?” he grumbles as I tip my chin up in his direction.
“Trying to get your attention.” I stretch my legs out in front of me and lean back on my palms, feeling the cool damp dirt beneath them. It smells like earth, and flint, and pine needles.
It smells like home.
“You’ve had my attention since—”
I roll my eyes and wave a hand at him. “Yeah, yeah. Since I dropped my panties at your feet.”
“No. Since I first heard you laugh.”
