Page 65 of Merrily Ever After
She laughed. ‘Let’s hope that’s a transferable skill. I’m not sure what I want to do next, but I do know it’ll be indoors, I’m done with chilblains and a permanent nose like Rudolph. So if you hear of anything, girls, let me know. And, in the meantime, Merry, consider yourself on annual leave from the twenty-third of December, OK?’
‘Deal,’ I said, thrilled at the prospect. ‘I can’t tell you how grateful I am. This is going to be an excellent Christmas.’
I was dying to know what Cole had in mind for our honeymoon. He had missed his kids terribly when they were in Canada, and I didn’t want to be the one to suggesthe spend Christmas apart from them. I wouldn’t mind them coming with us, but would they want to? Unlikely that Harley would want to spend a week with newly-weds. And as for Freya – my new role as Daddy’s wife would mean that she hadn’t got her Christmas wish.
‘Oh, Merry,’ said Hester. ‘That’s exactly the sort of thing Freya says.’
My heart skipped a beat and I stared at Hester, horror-struck.That won’t be what she says this year, I thought,not if her parents don’t get back together.
I felt a wave of dizziness and blinked, trying to focus, but everything had turned into a blur. Around me, I was aware that the main courses had arrived, and everyone was oohing and ahhing about the aroma and how beautiful all the food looked. I pressed a hand to my face. Perhaps it was the alcohol, or maybe I was just tired with everything that had been going on, but I had a sudden urge to close my eyes and disappear.
‘Excuse me,’ I mumbled, pushing myself up from my chair. My crown slipped and fell to the ground.
‘Merry?’ Nell’s voice was full of concern. ‘You OK?’
‘Absolutely fine. Just going to the loo,’ I replied, without meeting her eye.
Inside the ladies’ toilets, I soaked a paper towel in water, locked myself in a cubicle and sat on the loo holding the cool towel to my forehead.Breathe, Merry, just breathe.
I couldn’t stay here long; I didn’t want anyone to come and find me locked in the loo on my hen night. Because they’d know I was upset about something, and I didn’t want to have to explain my hazy thoughts.
Iwashaving a good time with my friends and, apart from the crown, they hadn’t made me do anything tacky. And Cole would collect us later. As Nell said, we were theperfect couple, I wasn’t having cold feet about marrying him. I recalled Astrid’s misunderstanding about cold feet and laughed under my breath, but somehow it turned into a sob.
I want my mum to get back together with my dad. That’s what I want.
Oh hell. What should I do? Anything, nothing? Tell Cole? Keep quiet?
‘Merry?’ I heard Hester call from outside the toilet.
‘In the end cubicle,’ I said, through the door, quickly drying my tears.
‘What’s up?’
‘I’m fine,’ I sniffed. ‘Just the alcohol making me emotional.’
‘Are you sure,’ she persisted, ‘because you seemed a bit distracted and then I made a comment about Freya and the blood drained from your face.’
‘Do you think she likes me?’ I blurted out.
‘Who Freya?’ Hester gave a laugh of disbelief. ‘I know she likes you.’
‘As Cole’s girlfriend maybe,’ I said, ‘but what about in the future, as his wife?’
There was a long pause and then the toes of her shoes appeared in the gap under the door.
‘Oh, darling,’ she said, her voice low. ‘I think I know what this is about.’
I shook my head, even though she couldn’t see me. ‘I don’t think you do.’
‘Was it something Freya said when you took her to see Santa?’
I froze. ‘How did you know about that?’
‘So I’m right.’ Hester sighed. ‘Look, kids can be very self-absorbed sometimes. Try not to take what she said to heart.’
‘Freya wants her parents back together and I don’t blame her. How can I not take it to heart when I’m the one preventing that from happening?’
‘That’s not true and you know it.’
