Page 99 of Merrily Ever After
Emily smiled at me with sympathy in her eyes. ‘I think this is the most Dad has said for months; you picked a good day.’
I nodded. ‘A brilliant day.’
She tapped the photograph. ‘Dad, was this photo taken that day you went to see Sam and Merry?’
He nodded. ‘Sam took it on my camera. There are more somewhere, I had a tin.’ He looked around the room vaguely.
‘In the wardrobe?’ Emily suggested. ‘Shall I get it?’
Ray yawned and nodded.
Emily went to the wardrobe and reached up to the top shelf.
He was getting tired, but there was so much more I wanted to know. About Mum, about her mental illness. I wanted to find out if he’d been in touch with her before she died.
Emily passed an old tartan biscuit tin to him, and he prised open the lid. His fingers fumbled through the contents until he found an old yellow envelope with Kodak printed on it. He put the tin on the floor and tipped the contents of the envelope out on the table. There were about twenty photographs, most of which had rainbow streaks of light across them.
‘Sam opened the back of the camera by accident,’ Ray muttered. ‘Ruined most of the pictures.’
My hands were itching to sift through them. ‘May I?’ I asked.
Ray nodded and then stood up. ‘I’ll clean my teeth, then I’m going to bed.’
‘Now?’ Emily asked. ‘Don’t you want to look through the pictures with us?’
‘No.’ His reply was so abrupt that it was almost comical.
‘Thank you for letting me see these, Ray,’ I said, my eyes sweeping the tumble of pictures.
He shut himself in the bathroom without a reply.
Emily picked up a photograph and handed it to me. ‘Oh, Merry, look!’
I gasped. It was of Mum and me. She was standing, with me on her hip, my head snuggled into her neck, her cheek pressed against the top of my head. Her eyes were closed but there was a huge smile on her face. It was a picture of pure joy, of love, of motherhood. Lookingat what we’d had, what we should have continued to have, tore at my heart. I pressed a shaking hand to my mouth and tears started to fall; I felt Emily’s arm wrap around me.
‘This,’ I said, joy and sorrow and yearning in my voice. ‘This is the best thing you could possibly have given me. I don’t know what magic brought you to me, Emily, but I’ll be grateful to you for the rest of my life. Thank you.’
‘You don’t need to thank me,’ she said, brushing away her own tears. ‘I know I don’t look it, but you’ve made me so happy.’
We hugged each other for a long time and then went back to the photographs. We found another lovely one of Mum on her own. She wore dungarees with a wide belt around her waist, her brown hair crimped and her eyes ringed with black eyeliner.
‘She was stunning,’ said Emily.
‘And just a child herself,’ I breathed.
The toilet flushed and Emily handed the photographs to me. ‘Put them in your bag, make copies.’
I nodded. ‘I’ll bring the originals back, I promise.’
She put the others back in the envelope and the bathroom door opened.
‘I’ve lost my pyjamas.’
We turned to see Ray stark naked and scratching his head in confusion.
Emily winced and jumped up. ‘Sorry, Merry, I’ll just—’
‘We,’ I said, standing up too. ‘Sisters. You’re not on your own in this now.’
