Page 114 of Perfect Alpha

Turning to Cade, I ask, “Have you heard from D-U-N-C-A-N?” Aidan doesn’t know who his dad is, but I don’t want to perk his curious ears.

Cade is seated at the breakfast bar reading a truck magazine, and he freezes with a page between his fingers mid-turn. “That’s going to be a thing.”

He won’t meet my eyes, and heat rises in my chest because I can’t believe he’s already cut me out when I’m sacrificing everything to move my life – again – for him.

“What do you mean,athing? What happened?”

Cade jerks his head towards Aidan, as though I hadn’t noticed he was there.

“Give me the Coles Notes then,” I tell him.

He sighs and runs a hand through his hair, a nervous habit he’s had since high school. “We met, he said he’d sign, but he’s changed his mind. It’s going to court.”

“Oh, my God,” I exclaim. “Why didn’t you tell me?”

“You weren’t here.” He lifts his gaze to meet mine, and there’s a challenge in his eyes.

“Oh, we’re going to play that card, are we?” Crossing my arms over my chest to steady myself, I take a deep breath and prepare for war.

“I was going to tell you later,” Cade mumbles, dropping his eyes when he realizes that his usual bullshit won’t work this time.

“When?” I demand. “I just told you how important it is for you to include me in everything.”

“Right. Youjusttold me. Sorry I can’t retroactively fix it.”

“Auntie Victory angry?” Aidan asks, his lower lip trembling.

I scoop him up in my arms. “No, little man, I’m not angry.”

“We go Mama’s work now?” Aidan asks hopefully.

Tears fill my eyes, and I can’t find my voice as I stare into the terrified eyes of the toddler in my arms. What the hell can I say to make everything okay again?

“We’re going to stay here,” Cade softly interjects. “You’re going to have a bath with extra bubbles, and then we can read whatever books you want.”

“Just want Mama,” Aidan whispers. When he dissolves into sobs, my heart cracks down the middle. I want to fix everything for him, and I can’t. It’s the worst feeling in the world when a child you love is suffering, and you have no way to help.

“We have to find someone for Aidan to talk to.” He’s screaming into my neck, and while Hannah would know exactly how to calm him down, I’m at a loss. “We have to help him process this loss.”

Cade nods. “I’ve been making some phone calls. I found a grief counselor who specializes in helping kids.”

Shaking my head, I walk away from Cade and try to put physical distance between my anger with every step. He follows me but I ignore him, which is easy to do when Aidan won’t settle. I pretend Cade doesn’t exist as I pace the house, softly singing Aidan’s favorite songs.

When he finally falls into an exhausted sleep, I set him down on the couch.

“Victory,” Cade starts, but I hold up my hands to silence him.

“It shouldn’t be this hard for you to tell me big things that are happening in your life,” I say, as hurt piles up in my chest, making it hard to breathe. “Anything that affects Aidan is something I want to know. I shouldn’t have to tell you that. I shouldn’t have to find out everything after you’ve already done it.”

“I’m sorry,” he says.

“You’re always sorry.”

“Fuck.”

“As soon as I think we might be okay, something else happens. I have so much going on right now–”

“And I don’t?” he demands.

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