Page 45 of Smoke the Enemy

“Oh, honey, sometimes it’s exciting getting to know someone with secrets. It takes the fun out of it if you know everything about the person right away.” Lois’s advice really hits home on this one. I study the elderly lady, my appreciation for her growing tenfold.

“Did Walter keep secrets?” I ask, my voice low.

Lois’ smile thins out, but she still has that dreamy look in her eyes, “Some of those secrets he probably took with him to the grave. Powerful men can’t always share everything, and sometimes I truly believe it is a saving grace not to know.”

Her words affect me more than she probably realizes. It’s already hard to know about The Illicit Brotherhood. I don’t know the extent of what they do or the people who may have been hurt along the way. Maybe Lois is right, would I want to know? Would it change how I feel about them? There are still obviously secrets at play, and they don’t seem to mind keeping things from me. But I’m safe when I’m with them. Even in our most depraved and intimate moments I can feel they don’t want to hurt me. Falling in love with one person is hard enough, but falling for two and when they want me just the same…the fates certainly had to align for us.

Lois eventually goes back to her work at the computer, and I finish emptying all thirteen carts of books before my shift is done. Before I leave I grab my bag and check that my new can of Mace is in there. I have two messages waiting for me on my phone.

Kali: I got called in to work for a few hours. Be home late :(

Soren: Come to the Delta house when you are done, Little Mouse.

I reply to Kali that I’ll see her later before closing that message out and opening Soren’s. I’m relieved to finally hear from him, thankful that it means he’s alive. His words jump at me and my pulse races. Nothing good has ever happened anytime I’ve been in that home. My skin flames hot thinking of the last time, the memory squashed by the fact that Alex turned up afterwards and everything went to shit. Still…maybe it wouldn’t be bad to be within their walls for protection since Bryce is still running around.

Soren: Don’t make me chase you again…

Me: Okay. I’ll be there.

Ittakes me twenty minutes to go home, change, then drive over to the Delta Pi Theta mansion. The large building with grand columns looks haunting against the bare trees and sunset. Even with butterflies in my stomach, and my knees feeling jittery, I somehow I manage to get out of my car and walk up the stairs to the front door. Before I can even lift my hand to knock, the door is opened and Soren stands in front of me. I don’t think, I just leap. My arms wrap around his neck and he catches me, holding my body against his.

“Let go upstairs, Little Mouse,” he whispers into my hair and I nod quietly, hating that my eyes are filled with tears. All the drama, being scared to death, and feeling so alone chokes me. Soren keeps me wrapped in his arms and takes me up to his room. The contrast is noticeable between his and Steffan’s room, reminding me once again that although they share the same face, they are two very different people. Once his door closes, Soren glances at me. As if sensing my thoughts, he looks around his room. “Are you looking for him?”

I whip around so fast my hair almost smacks his face. “I’m not.”

Soren slides his finger over his lips, “If he was here, would you like it?”

My throat goes dry, swallowing down my nerves feels like swallowing sandpaper. “I want you both.” I tell him confidently.

“Do you want Alex as well?”

The question takes me by surprise, so much so that I don’t answer immediately, which causes Soren’s glare to harden. “Why would you ask me that?”

“Why would you ask him to cut you?” he asks through clenched teeth. “I thought you were scared of him? I thought he repulsed you? Yet you want to give him a fucking weapon? Do you want him to lick your blood and fuck you? To use your own fucking blood as lube? Is that what the sweet little church mouse wants?”

I walk over to him and slap him. “Don’t you dare try to make me feel ashamed!” I cry out. “That’s what he did…and that’s why he’s no longer a part of my life.” My whisper comes out broken and hoarse.

“Make me understand.” He grips my neck and brings our foreheads together. “You’re my first relationship. As fucked up as ours is, this is all I know. You have to explain this because right now — I can’t make sense of this. If you want to get off and knife play, thenIwant to be the one to give you that. Not him.Not. Fucking. Him.”

I nod vehemently. “I want you. I want you and Steffan. He– he– I don’t know!” I pull away and pace his room. “It’s like he has this way to lure me in. It was right after my wreck. I was so confused and shaken, Soren.” My voice turns pleading. “He was there for me, and he knows how to smooth talk me. I’m scared. I’m so scared of him, how he makes me feel, and how easily I can be manipulated by his charm.”

Soren scoffs. “Yeah, he has some kind of fucked-up mojo.” He walks over to his desk and grabs a cigarette. I wait patiently as he lights it and takes a few drags. He’s in his own thoughts, and I need to give him that space to process our conversation. After a few minutes, he puts it out and turns to face me. “So, you wish Steffan was here?”

I give him my honest answer. “I don’t wish he was here. But I wouldn’t mind it if he was.”

“Hmmm.” Soren studies me, his eyes darkening and growing hooded, “Maybe we can show him what he’s missing first.”

I don’t get to answer before Soren is gripping my face, his lips crashing down on mine brutally, like he’s starved for me and I’m his favorite meal. I move my mouth with his, but it isn’t enough. He bites and sucks at my lips until they part for him, and his tongue can slide in to dual with mine. My hands grasp Soren’s shoulders, fighting desperately for balance. His grip onmy sides is punishing and needy. Soren walks us backward until my knees hit the edge of the bed. With a hand on my chest he shoves me onto the bed, my body bouncing as my eyes fly open. Soren is wearing a devilish smirk, daring me to admit it hurt a little. Only I want it to hurt. I think I’ll like it when they hurt me.

Soren’s hands reach for my leggings, and he tugs them down. My scrap of underwear soon follows. I’m bare from the waist down and he’s still completely dressed. Heat turns my skin pink from embarrassment.

“Don’t be shy, Little Mouse. I love to see you at my mercy before I devour you,” Soren’s voice rasps, and something about the tone he uses makes my insides quiver. He reaches into his drawer and pulls out a navy-blue tie. My eyes widen. I watch in fascination as he lifts my shirt off so I’m completely naked before binding my hands together with the silky material.

“Arms up, Taylor.” I lift my hands above my head, and he secures the tie to the bedpost. I’m completely stretched out for his eyes to see, my skin growing slick.

“I don’t get to touch you?”

“Not right now,” Soren teases while unbuttoning his white dress shirt and letting it fall to the floor. His pants follow, and I watch in fascination at all his bare skin, and at his perfect, Adonis-cut abdomen that is bared. Soren uses my shock to his advantage. He climbs over me, settling between my legs, his calloused hands running over my body. His hand cupsmy jaw and he leans down to kiss me again while I arch into him, wanting more, needing more of his heated skin against mine. Everywhere he touches makes my skin feel alive. He grins down at me before kissing me slow and deep. Soren grabs my hips and twists my body so we’re lying on our sides, my leg draped over his hip now. His hand moves between our bodies, over my stomach until finally he reaches between my legs, cupping, before sliding two fingers through my arousal into me and rubbing at my G spot. I moan into our kiss while he continues playing with me, dragging his fingers out, running them through my dripping pussy, spreading my arousal around, gliding back until he slips a finger into my ass. I jolt at the contact. It still burns slightly, but Soren works to keep me occupied, kissing and licking at my lips. His free hand coming up to play with my breasts, pinching my nipples between his fingers. My arms strain against the material of the tie as I feel it rubbing on my skin.

---