Page 137 of Cavern of Silence
All I think about is Julieta. Her pain-filled eyes haunt me. Her voice, begging me to let her die, runs on repeat. And the first night I made love to her, when she claimed she didn't have anything to live for, is etched in my brain, torturing me.
At the beginning of every fight, Jonas or his brother Evandro warns me. If I kill any of his men, he will torture Julieta before murdering her. And when I die, her time on earth is up, too.
So the beast comes out. Every punch, kick, and jab is for her. And each night, I find the fastest way to kill my opponents.
I don't even listen to their list of sins Jonas or Evandro insist on telling their crowd of men about anymore. They are all part of them somehow. They chose to follow them and devote their life to evil. But even if they were innocent, I would kill them to save her. So the monster in me has been released, and I don't know the person I am anymore.
Lately, Jonas hasn't been around and only Evandro has been leading the events. But he's just as dangerous and sick as Jonas.
The other night, I had a dream. It wasn't my typical dream I have every night about Julieta. I normally see her laughing and reading bedtime stories, or swimming with pigs, or telling me she wanted to be my wife.
And I dream of her kisses. They feel so real. But they aren't.
Instead, Maureen paid me a visit. I had just gotten back from a fight. Exhausted and cold from the hose shower they give me after each event, I collapsed on the dirt and fell asleep.
Maureen held me in her arms, and I cried.
"Shh."
"I don't know how she is." I sobbed.
Maureen stroked my hair and kissed the top of my head. "She's okay. She's surviving and hasn't been hurt again."
I gazed up at her. "She hasn't?"
"No. Not physically. But she cries for you as you weep for her."
"I need to get to her before they kill her."
"There's a bigger problem, Ryker."
"What?"
"Her ex-husband. He's coming after you."
"Miguel?"
"He isn't a good person. Don't question anything when you see him."
Maureen left after those words, and I woke up screaming for her to come back and tell me what she meant.
And I'm not sure if I'm going crazy or if it really was Maureen.
I know she wanted me to find someone else and not live the rest of my life alone. When you're sick for fifteen years, you talk about things you never thought you would. Each time she got ill, she would tell me to find someone who would make me happy, someone I could grow old with. But I would get angry, and she would have to calm me down.
I didn't want her to die. But Maureen seemed to know her cancer would one day take her. On her deathbed, she said the biggest thing she worried about wasn't dying. It was me moving forward.
So I don't know if it was truly her, warning me from the grave, or if the dirt pit is making me hallucinate. But it's driving me crazy.
Why would I create a situation in my mind where Miguel was one of them? But how could he be? Surely, if he were, then Julieta wouldn't have been subjected to working on the planes with dangerous men who tortured her?
I stew in my cell. The voices of men in the room next to me fill the air. It's where I first woke up, and it's a sign I'll be fighting tonight.
The only pattern in this hellhole is my feeding schedule and new men coming into the bunker. They never last an entire night. And the walls aren't thick, whether Jonas intentionally created this scenario or not, I don't know. But I hear them plead their cases, just like I did the night I was in the room.
But I have no mercy for them and will show them none. If anything, their stories only invoke the animal inside me to fight harder.
I'm pacing the room as the men beg, each asking for different things. Most of them only try to save themselves. Then I hear his voice, but it's in Spanish, so I don't know what he is saying. I listen carefully, wondering if I am hearing things.
