Page 66 of Haze of Obedience
"Are you happy now?" I accuse.
He pulls me into him. "No. How did you survive that?"
"How does any whore survive?"
"Stop calling yourself that."
"Why? I was paid to sing and entertain. My bank account is worth millions. That makes me their prostitute."
"They raped you. That's not your fault."
Since before my first incident with Antonio, no one has said that word to me. It's five letters I don't allow myself to use because I hate the truth and fact it happened.
I turn away. "I had to have it all. I couldn't be content with where I was at."
He turns my face to his. "Ambition doesn't make any of this your fault."
"Doesn't it?"
"Absolutely not."
"I should have been happy with what I had."
He places both hands on my head. "Listen to me, Zoe. You did nothing wrong. Their actions are on them. What they did to you..." He wipes the tears off my cheek with his thumbs, "You didn't deserve any of that."
Years of holding everything in and guilt flood me, and I sob.
He holds me tight to him, trying to calm me, stroking my head and kissing it from time to time.
Along with the pain of the past, is the pain of the future. Now he knows what they've done. There is no more hiding. As much as I wanted to be the Zoe Diego he assumed I was, I'm not. And any hope I had for us to somehow get past the events of this morning and move forward together is impossible.
There's no turning back once the truth is revealed.
