Page 151 of Marks of Rebellion
I look down at myself. I haven't showered in several months and probably smell like it. My face is covered in a thick beard. It might frighten Vanessa when she wakes up since she's never seen me with anything more than a bit of scruff.
But I hesitate. "If she wakes up—"
"Leave the door open. It's not even a foot away. I'll get you."
"Sorry, I didn't mean to insinuate—"
"No worries. Take a shower. Then you can rest better."
I keep the door open and shower quickly. When I finish, I shave my face and come back out to the bedroom in my towel.
"Feel like a new man?"
"Yeah."
Faron pats me on the back. "I'll see you tomorrow. My direct extension is on the card I put by the phone. Call if you need me. Get some rest."
"Thank you."
We shake hands, and he leaves.
I lock up, turn off the lights, and climb into bed with Vanessa.
All night, I don't sleep. I listen to her every breath, watch her every movement, and inhale the scent of her skin. Too often to count, I kiss her forehead or caress her cheek.
Sometimes, when she starts to cry harder, I hum Bob Marley to her, since it's really the only reggae I know by heart. It seems to calm her sobs.
I murmur to her how much I love her and how she needs to come back to me.
And I tell her how I killed Carlos and that the bastard will never again touch her.
When the morning comes, the ship leaves the dock. Within an hour, we're well into the ocean and gently rocking side to side.
I pull the curtain and open the slider door to get the fresh ocean air and as much sun inside as possible.
Jerry brings breakfast to our room. I don't eat a lot and try to wake her up, but she can't seem to come back to me. But when I put the bottle of water to her lips, she drinks some.
"That's a good girl," I praise her softly.
When Faron comes to check on her, I express my concern about her not eating.
"If she isn't awake and able to eat something by tomorrow, I'll get an IV of nutrients for her. It wouldn't be bad for her nervous system anyway, but I'd rather do that with her consent so she feels empowered and not controlled again." He quickly takes her temperature. "Her fever is down a little. Try to get some more water in her. I'll come back this afternoon and see how you're both doing."
He leaves, and I put the tray of food outside our door.
I pace the small room. It's only ten steps from the door to the balcony, and the bed is right near the slider.
Vanessa is quiet, so I sit on the balcony, staring at the waves, praying she comes back to me.
At times she starts to cry, I rush in and hold her.
Jerry brings more food, and Faron does another check and says he'll return at night.
Nothing seems to change. She stays asleep. Her eyes flutter now and again. Her sobs come and go.
All of it tortures me. The desperation I feel for her to wake up tears me to pieces. I try to ignore the fear consuming me, but it's nearly impossible.
When Faron does his night check, I'm struggling to keep my eyes open and ask him to stay while I shower again. He agrees, and I keep the bathroom door open in case she wakes up. After I finish, he says, "You need sleep. She's going to need you strong when she wakes up. You look like hell. When did you sleep last?"
