Page 56 of Crazed

These are the moments with Massimo where he breaks me. It's as if I can feel my body shattering into pieces, no longer able to stay in one piece, yet not completely destroyed. I cry out, "Sir, please! I-I can't do this anymore."

He tosses the paddles on the floor and jumps in front of my face. He removes the blindfold, grabs my tear-stained chin, and adamantly states, "You can do whatever you choose. Now, what else are you lying to me about?"

My vision is too blurred from my tears. In a moment of delirium, I admit, "I lied. I have the handbook."

Silence fills the room. A chill passes over me, and Massimo turns the vibrator off. He pins his steely blues on me, fuming, "What did you just say?"

Dread fills me. I curse myself for not controlling my mouth. But there's no way to backtrack. All I can do is fess up. I sniffle then repeat, "I have the handbook. Alicia dropped it off on my desk."

"And how much time do you get?"

"Two weeks."

He licks his lips, assessing me, then asks, "Why did you lie?"

Everything in the room shifts. It's no longer a game we're playing. The hurt radiating off Massimo permeates into me. I answer, "I don't know."

"Yes, you do."

"No. I don't," I insist.

"You're going to continue lying to me?" he accuses.

"No. I-I–"

"Are still lying," he interjects.

Thick silence develops between us. My tears continue to fall, and everything I hate about what I have to do to him attacks me.

He enunciates his words, as if he's afraid he'll lose control. "You lied because you don't want to go on vacation with me."

"No! That's not it," I protest.

"Then what is it, Katiya? Hmm?" he spouts.

A few minutes pass, but I don't speak.

He shakes his head, rises, and declares, "Fine. Don't answer me. When you're ready to tell the truth, I'll return. But know this, Katiya." He points to a tiny green light near the corner of the ceiling. "If you move, I'll see it. If you come, I'll know. Any further disobedience, and I'll end all of this between us."

Fear fills me. I cry out, "Massimo! No! Don't break up with me. Please!"

His dangerous, hate-filled eyes rest on mine. It makes me wonder if he no longer loves me, creating more panic. I try to reach for him, but I can't move my hand. He catches the movement and crouches in front of me, swiping at my tears. "Last warning, dolce. You decided to lie to me. Not once but multiple times. If you want my forgiveness and trust again, you're going to have to earn it."

"How?" I barely choke out.

Dark shadows dance on his sharp features. He traces the outline of my sweat-coated hair. "Follow the rules, Katiya. If you want me ever again, show me you know how to follow the rules."

He rises and disappears out of my vision.

"Massimo?" I fret.

"You don't have permission to use my name," he reminds me.

I swallow hard. "Sorry...sir. Please don't leave me."

The tone in his voice makes goose bumps pop out on my skin. "It's too late for that. You need to think about what you've done."

"Please! I-I don't want to be alone. Can't you stay? I promise I'll do everything you want," I vow.

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